By: Kimba
First off, let me note that this is the longest updates day we
have ever had. Usually when I write my summaries, I have about 7-8 pages of
updates to sort through. On a long day, it is about 10. Today? 17! So this it
going to very choosy; I ~will~ get the important stuff in, but I can’t be blamed
if I miss something.
A bit after nine in the morning, the usual HGs
tumble out of bed: Erika, Jack and Jun, while the other HGs continue to snore
away. Not much happens in this interim but Erika and Jack lounging in bed,
dissing Dana and helping each other memorize the colors of their shirts from
the veto competition on the previous day. At ten-thirty, BB issues a wake-up
call, but when Dana and Jun get up, it is not clear from their comments whether
it was the first call or fourth. Dana seems to think it was the latter and that
since only a handful of them are up and at ‘em, BB will be upset. Not soon
after, BB announces a lockdown.
The morning falls to chitchat as HGs
shower, brush their teeth, make breakfast and comment on the loud, rumbling
sound coming from outside (it sounds like a steam cleaner, but they suspect it
has to do with cleaning the pool). As Dana and Jack prepare their first meal for
the day, they banter back and forth and Jack, without David at his side, manages
to make a few worthy jokes:
Dana: Did you have a good night?
Jack: Well, I didn’t have sex.
Dana: (laughs) Nobody did.
Jack: It’s hard not to think about.
Dana: David is in there.
Jack: Yeah, I have my back to him. That isn’t safe. Maybe I should turn
around.
Around quarter after eleven another wake-up call sounds (“that
~has~ to be the fourth,” Dana mutters) and the rest of the HGs crawl out of bed
to greet another sunny day in California. BB then announces that there will be a
luxury competition by one o’clock. An hour before, the HGs gather in the living
room and pull ping pong balls as they did on the previous day in order to
determine the order of the competition. David is first up; Jun is last. But
before the competition gets underway, a little fun is had in the bathroom at
David’s expense. Apparently he had stacked some furniture in front of the little
potty room, and Alison, in retribution, throws a couple of glasses of water onto
the glass door to make it transparent. He, of course, clowns around and we get a
couple of nice shots of his heinie (check out the caps!). Jack and Nathan,
meanwhile, are discussing what hairstyles they prefer for women, and as Nathan
puts it, “I only like girls with hair longer than their shoulders. It takes a
certain type of girl to have really short hair.” (Nathan is, by far, the most
backward, ignorant fool I have seen on BB—ever!!) Of course, Jack is not much
better: “Whenever I think of short hair, I think of Julie Andrews and it makes
me want to throw up.”
Pre-competition tidbits of note: Alison thinks
orange juice has a “natural caffeine” in it that non-coffee drinkers use to stay
awake all day. Erika only buys cheap sunglasses now since she always sits on
them and breaks them. Nathan mentions that he won’t marry a “girl” who cannot
cook (surprise, surprise). All the HGs speculate on what the prize for winning
the competition today will be; some assume great things are waiting such as cars
or treadmills or concerts (though some of this is definitely said with
humor—especially when David guesses “hookers”).
Just after one, as
promised, the competition begins and the HGs learn soon enough that their
versions of “luxury” are not exactly met by BB’s version; the prize turns out to
be a four course dinner with the HG of their choice. The rules are as follows:
each HG gets a bottle of champagne. With it, they must fill a glass and put it
on a tray. They then get spun around and around and around on a chair until they
are sufficiently dizzy. Immediately, they must get up, grab the tray with the
champagne on it, and carry it across the yard without spilling very much of
it—beyond a marked red line. If they do, they must go back and refill. Whoever
can do this in the fastest amount of time wins. Jun, as usual, complains the
second she can: “Alie is a ***** ice skater—she should be okay spinning.”
And right Jun is, for who wins but Alie herself? Her time is 11.40; the
second closest, I believe, was Erika with 14.81. Poor Jack sustains a nasty
injury after having fallen and smacked his face into the ground, enough so that
there is a brief FOTH to administer medical attention. When back, however, he is
grinning in good humor and taking it like a sport, much unlike Dana who
continues to whine over and over how nauseous she is. Just be thankful you
haven’t had your Burger King yet, Dana. Alison chooses who other but Nathan to
accompany her on her dinner, and toting their bottles of sparkling California
wine, the HGs head in and the competition is over.
Immediately the HGs
take to lounging and chatting as usual, and one comment by a poster made me
giggle because of a typo: “Nathan says Erika is going to pose for Playboy when
she gets gout.” Haha. Nathan and Jack say they will both want autographed
copies. Jee remarks how glad he is that he didn’t win the competition, because
he would have taken one of his fellow Stooges and that would have looked “gay.”
The trio then discuss what ways they like to smoke pot and soon after,
unsurprisingly, the feeds change. At 2:30pm, the daily repast of Burger King
arrives and the conversation lulls as the HGs feed. David is wearing Amanda’s
hat today and the camera frequently shoots a close-up of him as he gobbles up
his food.
Once satiated, the house falls to general chat and merrymaking
as they slurp up their remaining champagne (except for Robert who is a
recovering alcoholic). A lot of “I am so drunk” comments chorus throughout the
afternoon. Jee gets a tad horny (“affectionate” as he terms it; or “sleazy” as
the others do) tipping the bottle and staring at Alie’s backside, while Nathan
gets so tipsy, bumping into walls, that Justin comments he is like a “girl” and
can’t imagine what he would be like in a club. It could be because he never
drinks outside of the BB house, Nathan admits. Justin says that he is funny when
he is drunk, but that Alison “gets violent.” A round of “Girls Gone Wild” jokes
follow this comment, and Alison laughingly protests that she has never even
“flashed.” Justin tells Jack that he will be “mobbed by the older ladies” when
he gets out of the house and then qualifies the comment by adding, “those
thirty-something, late-twenties women.” Wow, as a 27-year-old woman, it’s a
shock to learn that I am an “older” lady already. Sheesh.
By four
o’clock in the afternoon, Nathan is half-passed out in bed and Alison stumbles
in to topple over onto him. The camera gets in a visual joke as it pans from a
picture of Alie and her boyfriend to her sprawled out on top of Nathan. He
drunkenly comments, “I hold your destiny in the palm of my hand.” She sexily
replies, “You like that, don’t you?” They pull the blankets up over them and
there is a lot of movement occurring and a lot of protests getting steadily
weaker as their little romp continues. Eventually, after nothing much really
happened, they both fall asleep and all that can be heard is snoring.
Over in the HOH, a little cuddle action between Dana and Justin is
happening, as well, but it breaks up soon and innocently enough. She heads
outside and he follows a bit later. When the guys see Jee passed out on one of
the deck chairs, they get the bright idea to pick the entire chair up, walk it
over to the pool and dump Jee in. Unfortunately, Jee wakes up while being
transported and clings onto the chair for dear life as they are trying to dump
him and chants, “No, no, no, no!” At most a leg gets wet, but the HGs laugh
nonetheless and Jee wonders, “How long was I laying there? Am I a dork?” There
is a lot of fun being had at this harmless prank, and many posters hope that the
future will see more good-natured fun like this.
As the evening kicks
into gear, some chatter and happenings to note: David kicks their ball over the
wall and out of the backyard; he blames it on “the wind.” Jack asks Erika to
share his bottle of wine with him this evening and she accepts. Dana reveals
that there will be no America’s Choice this year—not only is that a brand name
they cannot use anymore, but they have no sponsor for it. Nathan misses his
nine-year-old sister (awww). The HGs again attempt to pool-dump poor Jee who has
fallen asleep on the same chair that is now directly next to the pool, but
despite their SWAT-team-like movements, he wakes up again in the nick of time.
After they leave him alone long enough for him to fall asleep again, they decide
now to decorate him with whipped cream, tickle him and hope he smooshes the
cream all over his face. When he wakes up to the prank, he starts yelping, “What
is this on my ear?! Gimme a napkin! What the hell is this? Gimme a napkin!!”
It’s actually quite hilarious. Erika and Jack don’t seem to know Nathan’s plan
to veto Alison, because they talk about how sad it will be to see her go (either
we know something they don’t know, or vice versa). Jack mentions his daughters
are 26, 21 and 19, while his “boys” are 37, 36 and 31. Erika tells Nathan that
it was 1998 when she broke up with Robert, and Nathan replies incredulously,
“1998?! I was in high-school that year!” *Sigh.*
Around seven in the
evening, Nathan tries to wake Alison up. Their date will be at nine-thirty and
they need to get ready soon, but Alison doesn’t seem too enthusiastic in her
groggy, post-inebriated state. She announces that she has “the worst hangover”
she has ever had in her “whole life, to be perfectly honest.” Poor Alie. No
wonder she isn’t ready for David’s retribution! While she takes a shower, David
moves in stealthily, dumps a glass of water on the door (again, to make it
transparent) and struggles with her to pull her towel away. Though she makes a
good effort to stay covered, there is some definite jiggling-action apparent
behind the glass. Egads! A lot of laughter and hilarity ensues, of course.
As dinner preparations begin, the HGs mill about and laugh over the
antics of the day. Several people can be heard mimicking Jee’s yelps for mercy
during the afternoon pranks, and more than one person reiterates over and over
through laughter how it all went down. Jack says several times that he was not
involved, but uh hmmmm…I saw the video and definitely remember Jack helping to
carry that chair! Talk moves on to the upcoming date and everyone is being very
supportive—that is until Dana shoots over to Justin, “Why couldn’t you win the
***** dinner?!” Nevertheless, many help out with advice or style tips as Alison
prepares to look her best. Erika helps her do her hair, and it looks very
attractive when she is finished. Nathan irons his shirt and the others are
encouraging him and Alison to have a good time. When he notices how red he is in
the face, he asks Jun to help him cover it up—and yes, once again we see a
female HG helping to apply make-up to Nathan’s face. To be fair, he just doesn’t
want to look silly on camera with a red face. Heh. Meanwhile, Dana is telling
Justin that Alie wanted to borrow her black skirt, but Dana wouldn’t let her—she
was too afraid she’d “stretch it out.”
When the two are finally ready,
much complimenting on their appearances ring out; Jack, in particular, tells
them that they look like “a storybook couple.” They wait in the living room for
BB to call them out to their dinner, and their conversation revolves around how
they are the stars of the show right now—both because of the dinner and because
of being nominated and getting the veto. We learn at this time, too, that they
have pet names for one another, literally: AlieCat and NateDog. Finally the two
get called to the DR; there is a brief FOTH and when we come back the two are
outside in the backyard enjoying their candlelit dinner.
You might think
that the romantic setting would spark some personal, interesting conversation,
but one of the first things we hear Alie say is: “I hope they’re all jealous of
us. I’d love to rub Dana’s face in this,” and she points to her cheesebread. The
hilarity continues. She tells Nathan that Pennsylvania is “colonial,” and when
he doesn’t know what she means by that, she explains, “It’s like civil war-ish.”
We also learn that she lost her license for driving too fast (or so according to
her). Surprisingly, there is not much game talk, but it may be due to BB’s
warning—several times they stray into talking about Dana and the game, and each
time they pull back and remark that they are “not supposed to talk about that.”
At times, I curse BB for this. I’d much rather listen to them bash Dana than
hear Nathan say that he wants to have a boy someday so he can pay for his
retirement (because a girl couldn’t possibly hope to earn enough money to help
her parents out, could she Nathan? Ahh, I am really trying hard not to be a
raging feminist here, but he makes it so damn hard!). They chat on into the
night about their families and friends, their career aspirations (or lack of)
and school, and their past relationships. If you’re interested in the Blondies,
it is worthwhile taking a gander at the updates; if not, I wouldn’t bother.
Inside, the HGs are wandering about doing what it is they do, be it chat
or play cards or vegetate. David washes some dishes and suddenly looks up at the
camera to say, “I could use a Sugar Mama. Attention internet Sugar Mamas!” They
fill out their Burger King orders, and ridiculously enough Jee asks for avocado
on one of his burgers. As a HG sneers, “Do you really think they have avocado?”
The HGs then decide that with no competition looming on the following morning
they are going to play a drinking-game (everyone but Alie, Nathan and Robert
join in). The game involves cards and rhyming and a lot of glug-glugs.
Apparently it is called “the circle of death” and requires each person to rhyme
a sentence with the one that came before them; if they screw up, they must
drink. Around ten o’clock, Alie and Nathan head back into the house (the date
lasted under an hour). They are told by the others to go change and come back to
join the game. While they are in the bathroom doing as told, it appears that
Nathan is rehearsing his veto speech to save Alison. It looks like her trust is
not misplaced. She, in fact, is so confident that she whispers to him that
tomorrow she would like to wear the veto necklace to sleep. Eventually they head
out to the living room and join the game.
The game continues for a bit,
but soon changes to other antics and fun inside and outside at the hot tub. The
party involves the usual drinking and chatter and sex-talk and antics.
Interesting bits: During the gabble of “I’m gonna be so wasted” and laughter, we
overhear Justin call Robert “Rat Bastard.” Hmmm, looks like we’re not the only
ones who think so. Jun, who is very, very drunk, tells Justin to “suck her
*****.” Rat Bastard says he’d jump to take advantage of Jun right now in her
inebriated state if “she had a better body.” (Can we count the many ways in
which this ***** deserves the name RatBastard?) Alie sucks whipped cream out of
David’s mouth. Several of the guys admit that they are scared of a drunken Jun
who grabs their “packages” and then calls them gay when they resist. When David
notices the hot tub is Jun-free, he climbs in where Dana gives him a kiss.
Alison encourages her to do it again, but she jokes, “No, he did it with
Amanda.” Shockingly enough, David chooses this moment to actually admit that he
~did~ do it with Amanda, and the others are reasonably surprised.
Meanwhile, Erika and Jack head inside where he tells her that she is the
“only woman in the house;” the rest act like they are in junior high (get out?
Really?). Nathan joins them—he’s had enough drink for the night and probably
doesn’t want to listen to the “Nathan is so gay” jokes anymore. He agrees that
the girls are acting very silly and annoying while they are drunk, and soon he
heads to get ready for bed with Jee following close behind. Erika takes this
moment to look up at a camera and say, “I just want to go on the record to say
that I think this show is really lame.”
After midnight happenings: Dana
and Nathan hang out and chat in the HOH room. Nothing much interesting is
said—Dana only repeats that she thinks Alison hates her and that is why she
nominated her. She also is not looking forward to giving up the HOH room. After
their convo, Dana walks over to the kitchen where she puts her arms around David
and mutters something to the effect of, “If you didn’t make out with Amanda, I
swear to God!” (Confusing, because I thought that he had admitted to ~sleeping~
with Amanda. Perhaps not.) Dana gives his neck a kiss and Jun jumps over to join
in. She then talks about how “swollen” her breasts are because her monthly
visitor is imminent. Though she swears she is sober now (she threw up), she goes
on to ask David, “What would you do if I crawled into your bed naked? Would you
hold me or slip it in?” David’s response? “I would get out of bed!”
At
this time, Dana looks outside and notices that Alison and Justin are getting a
little too close for her comfort…and indeed, they are. In fact, he is putting
hot wax on her breasts (she has her bikini top on) in the hot tub. They whisper
and it is hard to hear as the water is bubbling away, but what we do overhear
makes us go hmmm: Justin remarks, “Please! It’s not like I’m making her my *****
girlfriend.” Apparently Alison is trying to bring Justin over to their “side,”
but Justin isn’t having any of it. Throughout their conversation, they play with
the wax and when Justin waggles a finger at her, she playfully tries to bite it.
“You are so ***** scandalous…so ***** scandalous,” he says.
Meanwhile
the debauchery continues inside. Dana and David assume some rather stimulating
sexual positions, all in good humor and fun with the others cheering them on,
but David becomes a bit…aroused, shall we say? They talk about wanting private
rooms with no cameras and showering together, and in the midst of it all Dana
looks outside and says, “They’re still out there.” The two she is talking about
come in soon enough, however, but when Alison slips out of her bathing suit and
covers herself with a towel, Justin quickly tugs it away—and yes, we get to see,
for a few seconds anyway, a naked Alie laughing and scampering for her towel
back. When Robert hears about this and complains that he didn’t get to see it,
Justin remarks, “I wasn’t thinking about you! I was thinking about America! The
Internet!” I think I want to smack him, but doubtless scores of internet viewers
want to thank him.
Trickles of interesting bits long into the night:
Dana will “***** kill Nathan if he uses the veto,” she says. “Alie makes my
stomach turn. You have no idea how ***** sick it makes me.” (Sorry, Dana, who
was it who hates whom?) Justin makes fun of Alie to the others about her
attempts in the hot tub to sway him; he also says that while Nathan is a good
guy, he is a “***** moron” in the game. The others (Dana and Ratbert) join in
and really bash Nathan for being “such a little bitch”—they are obviously scared
he will use the veto. Meanwhile Alie is telling Erika and Jack how hard she
tried to sway Justin: “I even poured wax on his nipples! You have no idea!”
Erika and Jack then head over to the HOH room where everyone agrees that Nathan
is stupid if he uses the veto on Alison; they hope that Nathan is only playing
her to “deflect her passion” (in other words, prevent her from going ballistic
on him). A lot of Alie-bashing is occurring; Dana tells Justin, “You are lucky
if I ***** touch you after touching that bitch.” It seems like the warm cozy
feelings of house harmony before the date have all been banished in the presence
of hate, back-stabbing, jealousy and greed.
And so the tides of BB sway.
As the night trails off into morning, the talk about alliances gets chaotic.
Someone brings up Alison’s belief that Jee and Jun have an alliance, and
everyone laughs at her stupidity (if only they knew). Nathan doesn’t guarantee
that he will or will not use the veto when talking to Erika and Jack; he thinks
Alison is a “loose cannon.” Apparently he was upset by her actions with Justin
tonight, but he still thinks she is a strong player and would be good to keep
around on their side. David tells Nathan that if he uses the veto and Dave goes
up, he won’t harbor any hurt feelings about it. Is he sincere or trying to sway
Nathan? Who knows, but what we do know is that when Alison wakes up and she and
Nathan have a conversation in bed, all veto-hell breaks loose. Nathan tells her
how disappointed he was with the way she acted tonight: “You act like a freakin'
idiot. The whole house thought you were a freakin' idiot…I just had higher
expectations for you. I thought you were more of a classy girl, I guess.” She
cries. They argue. She bites at him, “If you don’t want to use it then don’t!”
And he replies, “Okay then, I won’t.” As she gets out of bed, he tells her that
she just blew it for herself.
A mini-tantrum in Alison style ensues. She
cries some more and threatens to leave the house. She doesn’t understand why
Nathan would be so mean to her. She asks him why he doesn’t trust her—she would
“never, ever come after (him).” He repeats several times that he is not jealous,
but from what we can see it appears he, in fact, is. As she begins to console
his manly feelings of inadequacy and assures him that he is her partner first
and foremost in the house and that she’d choose him over Justin any day, Nathan
finally tells her that he will save her. He doesn’t say it overflowing with love
and happiness, however; it sounds more like, “Fine, I’ll save you and then you
can do whatever you want.” But the feelings of discord only last a short time
before they are once again under the covers and cuddling and kissing. David
comes in and they reveal to him that their plan, in order to save him if he is
put up in Alie’s place, is to threaten Jun that she will be their next target if
she doesn’t vote against Jack. Thus, with Alie, Erika, Jun, and Nathan voting
out Jack, they will beat the three votes coming from Jee, Justin and Robert.
(Btw, it is worthy of note that earlier, while Alison and David were in bed
together, there were some suspicious movements under the covers; when Nathan
calls Alison on this, she denies that anything happened. Me, I just wonder why
this group just doesn’t all get nekkid and have an orgy and be done with it.)
Dana and Jun are in the meantime talking about how much they hate
Alison—they wish they could “take her on” in the street. They head to the
storage room to get toilet paper (they are out), but none is available. It looks
like paper towel it is. Before bed, Dana goes to the Stooges’ room and hugs each
one of them goodnight, paying special attention to Justin—kiss kiss. When she’s
back with Jun in the HOH room and Jun asks her what she is going to do about
Justin, she says, “Nothing. Absolutely nothing.” He is not her type, she admits.
He’s not only too short, but he’s got those cauliflower ears going on. By four
in the morning, they settle down into silence and sleep is not far behind.
As for AlieCat and NateDog, these two finally decide to settle down into
their separate beds for sleep, as well. Before they do, however, Nathan tells
Alie that Dana offered him a hand-job; she asks if he is serious and he says
yes. Alison recoils: “That is the most disgusting thing I have heard in my whole
life.” He then admits it was a joke, and Alison says, “I was really ready to go
stab her in her sleep.” Jealousy is a two-way street, apparently, and it looks
like Nathan likes it that way. (Note: For a more detailed account of the
Blondies’ convo, go to updates and look for Bert’s posts entered in around
4:00-6:00am on the 27th.)
And there you have it. The longest summary to
date. I just as heck hope less happens on Sunday, because I don’t know if I can
keep up with this! Till then, adieu.
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