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| Gratefulvw - HG"S are sleeping, here is Brendon's full speech to Rach last night after her nom speech |
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#13951244 8:01AM 31/07/2010 |
They are in the HOH room, Rachel sitting in a blue chair near the table and Bren is kneeling beside her, arm on back of her chair. Convo at ^:03 pm, camera 3
Brendon (very calm voice): So you have to play smart babe, you know? I just think, I just don't think that coming off as arrogant or egotistical is going to help us you know?
Rachel is looking down this whole, time, no expression on her face. When Bren calls her egotistical she just looks at him and then looks back down
Bren: It doesn't help us at all, in this situation. Because you just got made to look like the bad guy AGAIN (Rach looks at him) And all that stuff we talked about today, everybody we talked about today, putting all that stuff behind us, letting it go, putting it all behind you........know it's going to start all over again. You know? (pause) And guess what Hayden (rach look at him) Hayden now wants to f'n gun for us. And yeah, I got it we can probably beat them, but all those other ppl down there are feeling bad for him. So now, if they have a chance to use...I mean come huh....
Rach licks her lips and looks down to the floor still
Bren: Do you understand what I am saying Babe? At least ....I am not trying to make you feel sh*tty, what's down is down but you keep doing the same thing over and over again, and it's getting hard, cus I feel like, it's huh ....You know?.......This is why I wanted to talk to you before this happened, this is why I didn't want you up here with Kristin for f'n four hours, cuz we could have at least talked about what you were going to say and if I knew you were going to say that iwould have told you not to! I just thought you would have.....big sigh....
Rachel's eyes are darting around, briefly go on him, then back on ground
Bren: do you understand what I am saying, where I am coming from? (leans closer to her) and i am not saying it to be mean, I am not trying to put you in your place, it's not that, it's about concern for us. If our goal is to stay in this game longer, then those little things that you keep doing just keep setting us back farther, further and further and jsut keeps expanding that target on our backs. (long pause)
Bren: (slight stronger voice) And I don't know where it is coming from, I don't know what it is you have a chip on your shoulder that you feel you need to prove to everyone in this game? We got it!! Like everyone thinks that you are a f'n force to be reckoned with! They got it! I mean, you don't need to keep proving yourself and you don't need to keep talking massive sh*t to ppl beccause you have shown it, everybody is afraid of you!!! You know? But when you challenge ppl to come, and f'n gun for us, (loud) guess what???? They are going to come and gun for us!!!!! all those ppl that we just sat here f'n individuallyy saying we're good, we're good, we're good are probably like, f'n!!! Are you kidding me??? Who do these ppl think they are??? F'n better than us? They think they can't be stopped? They think they are going to win everything in here? You know?
Long pause.....he moves closer to rach and rach looks at him with an expressionless face
Bren: Okay? I am not trying to upset you, I am not trying to upset you baby, okay? (touches her chin) I am not trying to upset you I am just trying to tell you how that came out and how evreyone down there just perceived it! And I just don't know why you can't get control of it right now You are losing the control of your emotions and you are letting everything get the better of you! and I thought yoou had it under control, so I just didn't see that coming, you know??? (rachel is still looking at him but her expression is completely blank)
Bren: I am right next to you and you are being made to look like the bad...(shakes head) no, you are you've turned into the villin at this point, because we were the underdogs fighting for our lives in here and then after that speech, everyone is now going to think...guess what , you know?
Bren: touches her leg) I am not trying to upset you, I am just telling you that it is all about perception in this house and you just got perceived very, very poorly. I know that because that is exactly what I, I thought. And all those ppl that you didn't put up, yeah they are grateful but like.....bring it on???? Baby (goes to caress her cheek, rachel moves out of the way) No! I am sorry (touches her hair lightly) I am sorry, I am sorry I am upset, but I feel lke you are playing for me too! Me too in this game, because I am standing right there next to you in this game so if You do something it is representing both of us!, pause, I am careful of what I say, thinking that it is representing both of us all the time....long pause, Bren wipes a non exsistant tear from her eye....
Baby do you, I mean i am sorry, do you...I am sorry, I am not meaning to come down on you I don't mean to, I am sorry, it's just hard
. I feel like I am fighting a losing battle with you and I am standing by your side and I will stand by your side no matter what but when you keep doing and saying those things that are hurting us really, really badly it sucks, cause you are the one that keeps telling me how important it was for you to come here and play and win and when you keep doing stuff like that it is not going to help us win,, it's going to help us get out real fast...cuz we are not unstoppable, we are not undeatable, we are not one person we are two. So it is really easy for them to get us at any given time and all those ppl that we think are good with are going to think, you know what, I was cool with them but F that! You know what I mean? If they think we are full of ourselves and arrogant and f'n ..I mean it's just another reason, I mean Hayden, like before we went in there he said Hey whatever happens, happens, it's cool man, you know...I mean he figured out that he was going up on the block, but you know, I just shook his hand right now and he wasn't happy and I know what it was, it was just because of the way you said it...you know? You are not a mean person,so I don't know why you are acting like one, you know? YOu are coming off as one and it's all about perception in this house and those ppl down there are going to milk the sh*t out of that. God forbid one of them comes off the block and someone else goes up and neither one of the goes out, both of them are here to stay...this house is going to flip in a heartbeat because you have now been made to look like the villan. Long pause and then...I am trying to, I want us to play this game smart
Extremely long pause, Bren takes rach's head in his hands and says: I am not trying to come down on you, I am not trying to be mean to you, I am not trying to hurt your feelings... (it appears that Rach is trying to cry because she is sniffling a little and then bren wiped Rach's cheek....but the camera is up tight on rachels face and no tears can be seen.
Bren (continues): Okay? I am trying to explain to you how it looks to everyone in this house, even though they are safe, they are thinking that you just made a ballsy move by telling everyone to bring it on (shakes his head) Seriously, I just feel like we take one step forward and three steps back. We can't keep fighting like this, I don't know if I have it in me to fight like this all the way through the end of the game. For all this fighting we have done, we haven't gotten very far. I thought, seriously, what you were going to do right now is that they go one the block, Hayden is on the block, we make sure that she goes home, we make sure the POV doesn't get won, we cut a deal with Hayden and we are like Hey look, this is how it is...you took the risk by putting us up on the block, he had to understand , be reasonable, right now, we can make a deal with you that no one will know about, no one will suspect because you are up on the block, all the emotions you feel are real, no one will suspect anything and then we have someone on the other side of the house,that is all I could think about and then you go and say that and I am like, well that is it! We are going to have to fight the entire time in this house, every single week for lke, the entire duration. The only way that we can get out of this situation is that you have to stop doing this, like right now! You have to get over it,like I don't know what it is! No one is questioning you winning!!!! No one is questioning if you can do this....I swear to god, you feel how I felt sometimes, I felt I was catching myself with a chip on my shoulder and that is exactly the reason that I was upset with brit, because I come from a poor, I don't come from a poor, very rich family I had to struggle for everything so when I see ppl that are rich and takes advantage of them, it makes me pissed off and it makes me upset, but there is no reason for me to feel like that . Becaue brit didn't ask to be born into a family that is better, or more well off and you didn't ask for that, so there is no reason for me to get upset at you, there is no reason for you to get pissed. It's dumb, I need to let it go. The only way I am going to be successful is if I let it go. I have to get that chip off my shoulder I don't have to prove anything to myself, I mean to anybody else. I might have to prove it to myself maybe? But then I still don' t have to throw it in anyone's face or be mean to anyone, cuz I have something to prove, I can just be successful...you can just be successful in this game, no one is questioning it, especially now! You just won two HOH's are you kidding me? but now you have to...let your ego , put your ego in the backseat and not play like everyone in this game is out to get us, because guess what? that is called a self fulfilling prophecy. If you keep telling everyone come and get us, then everyone will come and get us, and you just challenged everyone down there to come and get us. So if I don't win HOH next week, there is a good chance that one of us is going up on the block. the only way you can recitfy the situation is stopping it right now, hitting the brakes on everything that you have been doing and the way you have been behaving, today and yesterday and you are going to have to apologize to them for saying that. And I am sorry that I want you to do that and maybe not right now and maybe you need some time to deflate and calm down or whatever it is...but I mean, that was mean that was malicious that was way too ballsy for ppl that have been fighting way too hard to stay in this game and we can't win everything, we can't win everything, there is no way! It is inhumanly possible to win everything from here now until the end ...there is a chance to so that, but it is a very slim chance. I would rather not gamble with slim odds. You're from Vegas, you know odds, you know probability. I would rather stick with safer odds, and play things the safe way and play things more intelligent than harder. Play smarter not harder, Right now you are just trying to f'n bull doze your way through this game and that is not going to, that is not gonna...I mean eventually we are going to run out of energy, run out of steam, you know. We are going to have to play f'n strategically and I am just afraid that you are losing it that you are not focused on a strategy right now. You are still so pissed off about ppl gunning for us that you can't let go of it! And just like I said, I have been telling everybody to come in here, we get all emotional, everything get's riled up but once i'ts over, it's over and to move foward in this game, you have to let go of whatever it is that happened yesterday and whatever has been dragging us down before this moment. If we don't do that, we are going to be doomed, I guarantee you.
Rachel slumps back in the chair and lets out a big sigh
Bren leans in again: I love you very much, and I wouldnt' say that if I didn't and I wouldnt' have fallen in love with you if I didnt' think that you really were a sweet person, and a nice person and not that egotistical and full of yourself. I think that you are still trying to recoup from the feeling that ppl are out for us, I got that, I feel it too1 And i know that ppl were after us and yeah, there was probably a good chance of us being up on the block, but....we have come a long way and we have done a lot of work and today, we spent f'n all day talking to ppl, taking the time, spending the time to guarantee that we are safe with these individual ppl/ But when you go out there and make a move like that it changes ppl's f'n opinions and it changes in an instant, in a blink of an eye. so now I fele like I have to win HOH next week, we don't have a choice, again, we are back in the same boat. the only way you are hopefully going to salvage this situation is by going and apologizing to the two ppl that you just challenged to come and f'n take us down. You know what it is like to be on that block, it's not nice, it's not fun, it's a sh*tty feeling. So as mad as you ...I mean you are talking about wanting to keep Kristin, so in order to do that you gotta be nice to these ppl, they are human beings! I mean you can't, you can't be like that to ppl no matte how upset or angry you are. And you have had plenty of time to get in control of your feelings ! So nobody is going to let you play that, get away with that card anymore! Yesterday, yeah everybody let you get away with your emotions because it was heated up, it was the heat of the moment. Now you have time to pause, think about it, so when you went down there and said that, everybody thought that is what you meant . So you basically just flipped off everyone in the room said F you, bring it on, let's go, try to come for us, see what happens! I I I I I have a lot of confidence in us, but I don't think we can take down the entire house, you are asking a lot of yourself and me. and maybe it's possible, but the odds are stacked 50,000 times more than they were before ... Long pause and then...do you understand that this is not a personal attack on you or me putting you in your place or me trying to control you? This is a serious concern for me! Cuz now I feel like you are playing for both of us cuz whatever you say represents me! So ppl are viewing US as the villian, US as the bad guy, NOT YOU, but both of us. So when you do things like that it is a little bit selfish because you are not thinking about us, cuz you are gambling for both of us in this game. When you are fighting for us, you are fighting for the both of us, and when you are syaing stuff, you are saying stuff for the both of us , so you ahve to be aware of that and so do I ! I have a lot , I have a learned a lot along this way and a lot of stuff I have llearned from you, but a lot of stuff you tell me you sit there and do yourself! So you aren't taking yur own advice, so you are not playing smart! You said that Ragan was playing too emotional and that is what you are doing right now, you are letting it control you!!! Extremely long pause...I don't want you to be upset with me, I don't want you to be mad at me for telling you this, cuz I am being honest and I told you I wouldn't lie to you and if I didn't tellyou this stuff right now I would be lying to you. Because that is not only how I feel but I am f'n super duper sensitive so I can f'n read feelings and emotions a million miles away and what you just said made me feel sh*tty and you weren't talking to me, so I can only imagine how they feel and you are better than that you are sooo much better than that! I want to be with that girl! I want to be with the girl that is, can take the high road and even when situations are pushing you and trying to push your buttons, you can over come it and you can take the high road and be the better person cuz I believe in you . I know it's not easy, I know a lot of times when we are in this game and someone is f'n squeezing our head with a vice and all you want to do it scream at them, but guess what? Ppl watch them squeezing your head in that vice and they don't like that either. Perception is KEY in this game. If everyone sees you as a bad person and you wlll be labeled a bad person and it will stick with you all the way throw this game. The stuff you said last night it was pretty bad, it was boderline and I am sure it rubbed some ppl the wrong way, but tonight you put the nail in the coffin. the only way you are going to get out of this and possibly save us right now is going down there and apologizing for what you just said. Because you let the emotions get the best of you and if you can't admit that and suck up your ego right now and tell them that you are sorry for what you just said then all those ppl down there are going to be gunning for us, I have no doubt. and all those ppl that just said they were not going to put us up will put us up, I have no doubt in my head. Cuz guess what, it's going to be a house vote, the house is going to want us out. Because we are f'n egotistical (rach has been looking coldly at bren this whole time, but when he calls her egotistical, her yes narrow at him, pissed ) we are ballsy, we think we are unstoppable, who is not going to want to take us out? I mean I am not going to lie, If I was sitting there and I didn't go up, I would be thinking in the back of my head, thank God I didn't go up but, those ppl are going to be bigger targets next week. Seriously, I don't want to go out and have you go out right after me. But that is what is going to happen if you , if this situation stays the same as it is right now. I may not have watched as many BB seasons as you, but I know ppl and I know when ppl take offense to what you say and everyone down there was heavily offended by what you said. THEY GOT IT, THEY GOT IT BABE!!!! I am not saying this to be a jerk, I am not saying this to be a dick, but you are playing like you have this 50 lb weight on your shoulders and it's suppose to be getting lighter and it's getting heavier and not because anyone else is adding weight ! It's because you are stacking it on yourself! You don't need to be doing that to us. YOU REALLY DON'T NEED TO BE DOING THIS TO US! I wanna win! I do! and I want to play fair but I also want to play smart, and right now you are not playing smart! You are fighting harder!!! I got that! But there is a time you need to play smarter and playing smarter out weighs playing harder. and right now we need to play smart, cuz we are going to need to save our energy for down the road, cuz it's probably going to get rougher or worse! but if we have to fight with the same intensity that we have been fighting for the past four weeks we are not going to make it and I am telling you that right now. And we are both not going to make it neither one of us1
I don't want you to be upset with me for saying this, I really don't want you to be upset. Yo umay be pissed off at me, you may be upset and you may be really pissed off at me, but I hope that at least you listen to me and think about what I said it starts to make a little bit of sense and maybe you understand! You know? and maybe we need to start making more decisions together. I understand that you are HOH but if we are going to be represented together, then maybe you should talk to me about stuff you are going to say! Or do! Because If I knew you were going to say that then I would have told you not too! I would have told you this and I thought you might have said something about letting the house vote...just taking a back step and letting me be neutral and not forcing ppl to take a step, cuz you are forcing everybody against us! and I jsut don't get it, I don't get it I dont' understand why! Why you want everybody to come after us like so you have something to prove that we are stronger than them, we are smarter than them, we are better and faster? I got that but one slip up and we are done! That is all it's going to take! And its not going to be you, it's goingt o beme! Or maybe it is you...I don't know! I am not trying to compete with you on who is going to go home first for sure. I want to be here with you, know that we are going to be in the jury house, I want to be here with you as long as humanly possible.
Extremely long pause and Brendon moves a chair over to her and goes to touch her hair.
Rach (in a very stern, attitude filled voice) Brendon, stop it!!!
Bren sighs and pulls her chair closer to his, facing her.
Rach (monotone now): I have to go to the diary room and get something out of there
Brief pause and then Rachel goes to get up, Brendon pulls her back down
Bren: Wait no!
Rach: I really do have to go down there and get some stuff
Bren: well what?
Rach (attitude): I have something down there that I have to get
Long pause, rach looks to the camera and looks away
Bren: are you upset with me?
Rach goes to says something, but stops : please just let me go down there and I really have to go down there and get stuff
Bren: Okay, well well well will you at least consider apologizing to them for what you said?
Rach (Rach looks away from him, smirks, looks back and says "sure" with attitude and a smirk
Bren: does that mean no? Should I just assume that is a no?
Rachel get's up and pulls her hands away from Brendo....begins to wlak to the door
Bren: I am asking you, Rachel!
Rachel (very loud, condsending and full of attitude) FINE, I WILL APOLOGIZE! BRENDON! (she pulls open the door and leaves room)
Brendon walks to the door puts his head down and says "whoa" then does a heavy sigh and leave HOH room
We see Rachel make her way to the HOH room and we hear some sniffling or snickering sounds. At first sounds like she is crying but then it sounds more like she is laughing under her breath. She pulls open the diary room door, we hear more laughing, and then you hear her say "HEEYYYYY" to production
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