"A Song That Dan Has Played Masterfully"

"Compassionately Written, Smart-Ass-Big-Brother-Commentary by Cindy Rutolo Dietrich

In the end I knew Dan Gheesling would win. He just wanted it so much more. He did anything he felt necessary to get himself to the end, whether it was ethical or not. So, yeah, I thought that he would win. I just wasn't looking forward to watching him win. Not that I wasn't long past ready for Big Brother10 to end. Au contraire. I couldn't wait for the Finale. It's just that despite their hurt feelings, and the betrayals I was afraid the jury would reward Dan for being a better player. And I was right.

Robert Garrett, a/k/a "Memphis" on the other hand, said he never expected to win the half a mil. Sometimes you get what you dream about. Sometimes you get what you expect. Memphis never even allowed himself to dream about being the big winner. Memphis kind of floated, lied and smiled his way through BB10. Dan pulled him along on that ride to the end. Then, Memphis decided he'd be satisfied with second place. Not that second place is all that bad. Memphis did leave with a car and fifty grand. But did he perhaps seal his own fate? Did he in effect give up, by deciding to settle for less? Did he in effect hand that win to Dan, because of a lack of will and imagination?

I've always hated movies based on a misunderstanding. I hate having to wait to the end for everything to be revealed. I hated having to wait to find out if the jury would find enough out to truly determine who was good. What was black? What was white? Who was right? The thing that stuck in my gut was this realization: by the time the jury found out that they'd all been deceived, it'd be too damn late. Because both guys still win anyway.

I never agreed with Renny Martyn about Memphis. He may have played a willing villain, but it was just an act. I think he's probably a half decent guy. I just never realized how clueless he was until those last endless days in the house. Then again he did win himself a nice chunk of money, so he did okay for himself. But he could have won so much more. "Winning this veto is huge for me. I'm glad that I have the sole vote to send somebody home this week." That's what Memphis said when he won that last veto. I wondered why Memphis felt safe, or happy about winning that veto. I also wondered why he kept referring to his ability to send somebody home as, "just business." Obviously he'd forgotten that evicted house-guests make a few stops before they get home. After some appearances, they go to the Jury House. They take their hurt feelings with them.

I liked Memphis better before he betrayed Angie Swindell, then Keesha Smith, and dammit even Jerry MacDonald. They were just stepping stones on a pathway to money. He didn't seem to value their friendship and trust as much as he did that potential for money. That goes triple for Dan. I guess I just wanted both of them to realize that there are, or should be, consequences for betrayals of trust. That'll never happen now. They've both won too much. "It was just business." Sometimes replaced, "It was just a game." But they're both an excuse that mean the same thing: those other people, and their feelings were expendable.

I still hate calling Big Brother that by the way. I hate calling it a game because real humans are involved. Real feelings are in play. People need to feel that they can trust one another, even in an adversarial situation. Especially in an adversarial situation they still need to bond. So they still try to bond. They still try to find others they feel they can rely upon. Keesha and Jerry were hurt more by Memphis's betrayal than by the fact that they were evicted so close to the end.

But, days after his betrayal of first Keesha, then Jerry, Memphis was still completely perplexed by their reactions. He couldn't understand why Keesha asked, "Are you remorseful?" 'Why would she ask that?' He wondered aloud. "Why would he feel remorseful when 'fifty-thousand' dollars was involved?" Forget about the fact that they were friends. Forget about the fact that Keesha trusted him completely. Why couldn't she understand that it was just a business deal? Too bad he couldn't figure out the answer to these questions because it cost him first place, and four hundred and 'fifty-thousand' dollars.

I'll never understand why Memphis didn't try harder to talk to, or comfort Keesha. That's what she wanted. That's what she needed. Why did Memphis sulk around the house instead, on her last night there? Why didn't he try to at least explain himself? What did he have to lose? And why oh why let Dan play the sympathetic hero? Couldn't he see the flaws with that move? He not only played a willing villain for Dan, he volunteered. So Dan was the hero. Memphis was the fall guy. And Keesha was crushed. She was so upset she just gave up. We really don't see that a lot. Once she found out that they planned to evict her, that was it. Keesha gave in. Keesha was done. Oh she cried, and swore. Then she cried and swore some more. But she literally threw in the towel. And why? She could have tried to make a deal with Memphis. She could have tried guilting him until he changed his mind. Cause Lord knows the man looked like he felt miserably guilty. But she didn't. She didn't even try. Neither did he. She had almost 24 hours left. But all she did was cry, swear vengeance and pack.

Truly Dan's most daring move occurred just after Keesha's eviction. No one has ever cleverly taken advantage of the those crucial, first moments of just evicted, live, on-air time, before Dan. I've always wondered why they can't seem to even remember that they're still being watched closely, and listened to, live then. Dan remembered though. I think he planned it, and it played out perfectly. Here's what he did, in case you missed it. As soon as Keesha left, Dan said to Memphis, "I really can't believe you did that." (Betrayed Keesha). "You're out of your mind if you think I'm taking you! (to the winning end.) "Out-of-your mind!" He was shouting it out for the cheap seats in the live audience, the cameras, and for us; the viewers at home. He even repeated it to make sure Keesha heard every little bit of it over the applause.

I actually felt a little bit sick watching him pace back and forth. He was expressing fake indignation. Out of the two of them, Memphis and Dan, Dan may be the better actor. All I kept thinking was, Memphis for God sakes say something! Do something! You're still on air. Protect yourself. Explain yourself. Expose him, now! Live. Before the whole world. Before Keesha returns to the Jury House. Speak! Open your mouth. At least respond to him by saying that Keesha's eviction was Dan's idea too. But Memphis said nothing. He might as well have been mute. And Dan wasn't even done. He threw Memphis under the bus during his good-by message for Keesha too. After that I don't believe Keesha would have believed Dan was in it from the start, even if he told her himself. She had such a wounded heart. And the damage had been so thoroughly done.

Dan all but guaranteed himself a win with that live air move. He knew too that he'd now have Keesha repeating what she just heard from her brave, little loyal friend, Dan, inside the Jury House. He set himself even more with that good-by message. And Memphis let another opportunity go by with a thundering roar. Because he could have explained, and apologized in his message too. No one had ever done anything like this before. No one's come close to being as calculating, as careful. This was the first time anyone took the time, and opportunity to actually act out a scene like this, live. It was the master stroke. It was the coup de tau. it was the killing blow. It was also a really low blow. But Memphis let it totally go. It was also brilliantly, evilly done. After that I was sure Dan had won.

"Let's do this like Judas!" Memphis said one boring day, only we were seeing it on Big Brother After Dark. Apparently Big Brother totally gave up that last Friday, on pretending that they were providing us unscripted, live t.v. So that BBAD episode was a taping from earlier in the day. In a way it felt like we were watching two guys in prison at times. Only one of them gets fifty grand, and the other one comes out a half of million dollars richer. Not the usual outcome of jail.

I can live without the endless glad-handling, and house-guest basing. For me the show was all ready over days before it was finally supposed to be over. There wasn't anything to show really any longer. So for me there wasn't a show any longer. There was absolutely nothing happening. So why watch? What was left to watch? Why stretch that last miserable week out? It's torturous for all involved. Now I'd be only to happy to watch, and report on the goings on in the Jury Room House. They're also still locked up, albeit in the lap land of luxury. Still, they can't leave, or they forfeit their stipends. I'd imagine they're still being watched, and monitored. So why can't we see some of what's monitored? I was dying to know if they were allowed excessive alcohol. Are there orgies? Are there fights? Have enemies made nice? Had they figured out Dan's game? Were Ollie and April still sleeping together? They wouldn't even have to show it to us 24/7. But forget about dragging us through three hours of BBAD at the end. They could just keep us sated by watering and feeding us an hour of Jury House live-feed once a day instead. The coverage could end when they break to deliberate. Then we could still be surprised during the Finale. And we wouldn't be bored to tears until then.

Actually only part of the last eviction show I enjoyed was that brief glimpse into the Jury House. The rest of the show was so distasteful to me. I was literally snarling at the T.V. screen. Memphis played his part in their whole little lame-ass charade like scheme, to deceive Jerry to a tee. His emotionless, flat affect got on my nerves. Then he threw the competition to Dan too, with Dan still calling him out. As usual it was over the top on Dan's part. But my problem was that it also went straight to the heart. It's all so sad. I hate discovering how shallow and low people will go just to win a little money. Why hurt Jerry that way? Why have him feel that someone was finally on his side? Listening to him thank Memphis for that day, and say how good it felt to finally have someone on his side, and how much he enjoyed getting to see this false side of Memphis, while knowing it's some kind of cruel charade, made me feel ill. Who said this was the way one had to win Big Brother money?. This is dog eat dog. This is gladiator, kill. Kill. KILL!. Not literally, but still. These kinds of betrayals are little deaths to the soul. And I still believe that counts for something.

I refuse to believe that I'm the only person offended by this. It is only natural to talk about what one's just been through. I understand that. But they don't have to continually talk crap about the others. I know that they're bored. We were bored too. But you'd also think that they'd care about being filmed. You'd think they'd remember that even if the evicted house guests aren't listening now, they will hear this stuff later. You'd think they'd realize that many house-guest family members watch the live feeds, and/or BBAD. You'd think that they'd realize that the harsh words directed at house guests, often go straight to the heart of their loved ones instead. But, on Big Brother wrong seems to be alright. And, black's sometimes white. Even lying's okay, because betrayal's game play. And deceit is a gift of velvet lips that pays off in the end no matter who gets ripped.

When Dan poured bullshit and wine into Juror #3 he wasn't sure it would work. He was becoming more Machiavellian by the minute, especially toward the end of BB10. But he was good at hiding it. He screwed so many people over in the house it was hard to keep up. But Michelle Costa was one of the most visibly hurt. That's why he took her on his luxury trip. He of course seized the opportunity to season, and/or poison the Jury House votes during this time as well. Dan seemed to think he was being all suave and disarming. I thought he was being transparent and conniving. "When I came up to the lunch table I saw there was wine." Dan says, "That's my truth serum. I know I need to pump Michelle with as much wine as possible. Hey, at this point, anything I can use to win this game I'm going to do."

It didn't matter if what he told her was true. He just needed her to repeat it. Then he got down to the nitty gritty. He asked if she could sway any one's vote. That was the kicker, and the key to her heart. He was implying that she was a player. "Out of everyone in the house, who do you think could sway people? "Michelle asks Dan with a giggle. She was so pleased that he'd figured it out. He was pleased that she was pleased about whatever he'd just pulled out of his ass to appease her. She still looked skeptical, and not at all won over when she left. But, he still won her vote, and perhaps first place. So maybe that wine really worked.

Jerry's exit came after Dan's trip with Michelle. I wondered what would happen to him back in the Jury House Would he live up to his repeated promise/threat? Would he get a touch of vengeance? Would he really be able to sway the jury? Would he even have time? What kind of reception would he receive? Would he be welcomed back home into the arms of the jury? Or would he be shut out, and left once again alone? Well he was hardly welcomed. That's for sure. I have to say I was impressed with how he seemed to handle it. It must have been hurtful and upsetting to get such a reception. Then again these Jury House scenes are so brief and edited, who knows what's really involved. I don't understand why we don't get to see more. I don't understand why we can't hear it all; especially those with the live feeds. Because all they show are a few well thought out comments from each jury member. I'd love to see more. And why not? What could be more real?

I'm sure there were quite a few blowups between the Jury members inside the house. Michelle told Dan that she and Renny got into a fight. It was over Memphis, not Dan. Renny said, I told you we should have got rid of him. Then one of the Big Brother people allegedly told Michele to "shut up" cause she went off. Keesha got a hell of a reception in the jury house too. April Dowling couldn't hide her absolute pleasure over her arrival. Her eyes glittered like bright blue, evil diamonds. If Renny hadn't been there, I think April and Libra Thompson would have thrown her down on the floor right there. They looked like they could eat her alive. She said she really only had to spend two nights in the jury house. She mostly kept to herself. I hardly wonder why. But of course she also had her friend Renny waiting for her inside.

"Remember when Jerry almost threw up eating slop? Dude, he probably had three seconds left." They were both floating leisurely in the pool. Just reminiscing. You know how it is with tools. I mean, two guys who are acting like guys.

"Yeah and I was just like, Just Eat It Jerry!" Memphis laughed heartily. Yeah, cause they were good times. "They're going to have a montage of me just not giving two shits about that old man. That's what blows me away. Cause hopefully everybody in America thinks I liked him."

"They probably do. Cause they're going to show you making the alliance with him two weeks ago to not go on the block."

Dan was still playing to the cameras with that remark. While Memphis just proved he'd been truthful with Dan. Dan knew about all of his promises, and alliances. While Memphis still didn't know about half of the things Dan had going. Dan then added a little fuel to the Jerry fire by saying, "He must have told me you were a womanizer at least five times."

"Dude. Did he really? Don't tell me that. You're going to get me fired up."

Right. Cause, Dan sure wouldn't want that.

Yep, the one thing they really bonded over, besides the prospect of all that money, and their spider pets, was their mutual dislike for the 'seventy -five' year old man. Yeah, he really got under their skin. Maybe it was because he wasn't a some push over. Maybe it was because they couldn't get rid of him sooner. Maybe that's why they couldn't stop talking about him, They also couldn't stop dishing. Like it was just so delicious; how they got over on all of them. Memphis mostly laughed. He had nothing much to contribute. I'm not sure his brain works right when he's out in bright sunlight. And in all fairness they were in the pool.

Dan's on the other hand, never stopped working. That's why the bastard probably deserved to, and did win. Dan continued to ask Memphis what he was thinking about this or that right up to the end. He pumped, and Memphis delivered information on cue. I wondered what in fact I would do. Unfortunately, ultimately, I'd probably trust Dan by now too.

By Sunday there was virtually nothing happening on the live feeds. They even gave the spider one of his own cameras during the night.
I actually forgot they were still live until I heard a splash one time. That's how over this was by then. This was dead air. With nothing but time on their hands, they just kept talking shit about the others. Why not? They were bored, and they could. They know they've won the money. They know the feeds are running. They know Big Brother would love nothing better than for them to dish. Dan still pumps Memphis for his every thought, his every comment, his every recollection. He occasionally lets something of his own thoughts and emotions to show. But mostly he's still pumping Memphis. Dan's all about the show. Dan continued to collect data right up to the end. Doubt that it mattered. But he still bled Memphis dry.

On their last day together Dan was still spinning. Don't know why at this point. The jury can't hear them. They're separated from one another for five days. So, I guess this was all for us. If it was just Memphis, I'd say he just forgot. But Dan remembered. He was still playing to the cameras.
Dan was also still looking for something to use. It was so obvious, and I was barely paying attention. Dan was asking him again about throwing HOH competitions. Juries hate hearing that anyone they have to award money to, purposely threw competitions. I fully expected Dan to use some of this info with the jury. This all felt like homework to me.

The more Dan drew out these conversations, the more Memphis revealed. He tells Dan everything.

"You have to be dumb to align with a showmance, because they're going out." Memphis says.

"You can't align with more than one person. That's what I've learned." Dan says. "It was me, Brian and Angie. Why did you hang on the vine so long?" He asks Memphis. I guess he was supposed to take a fall.

"I was trying to win."
"I thought you threw that." Dan said.
"NO! I told you!" (And he did. Several times.) "You don't believe me when I told you I only threw two? The Eliminator, and the first HOH, that was really the only two that I threw."

"How did you throw the vine one?"
"I was kind of falling and I didn't correct myself. Yeah, I really only threw two."

"That's not that many." Dan says. "I threw way more."

"The vine one," Memphis adds, "I wanted to win."

Why? Dan asks. Because. Memphis laughs. I wanted to stay safe. Dan said he was able to hang on longer because "every time I hit the wall I was able to lift my body to readjust."

The thing I found funny, not, about these scenes, was that Dan was still playing the game. Memphis was so, still not. Dan was still gathering information to use during the final Q& A. Memphis wasn't. He totally trusts. And why should he not?

This was the thing that cracked me up. "Here's the thing, if you're going to lie, lie. I only lied once. I never broke my word except one time."

What! What! What! Did Dan really say that? Did Dan really believe that? Because that's unbelievable. Who lied more than Dan in that house?
I only lied once? In what alternate reality did that single lie take place? And what, pray tell, did Dan feel was significant enough to count as his single lie? Memphis must have felt so safe with someone who only lied once. Too bad it was such a crock. Does he really think that he only lied once?

Dan added, "I respect someone more for admitting to lying, than lying about lying."

Yeah, that figures. He would.


Michelle said during the Finale, that Dan gave her an earful. But she was also a font of information for him, and me too. I was just happy to finally hear some of the details about the Jury House. First of all, these are plush digs. But of course we've already seen a touch of this ourselves. The Jury House members themselves get to have whatever they would have gotten during a Head of Household win; pictures from home, etc. This news made Memphis a little bit bitter. "I'm glad everyone got their pictures." He said sarcastically, as he'd not had any of those things. They also have Nintendo, tennis courts, basketball, a swimming pool. Dan thinks they may even have a private chef catering to their needs. I'm not so sure about that. Maybe he was just speculating when I heard it on the feeds. Nevertheless, Michelle must have been in heaven. I wouldn't mind a stint myself inside a Big Brother Jury House.

They can also have whatever beer and wine they want inside the Jury House. I've often wondered about this. Especially considering Big Brother's ludicrous, Big Brother like stronghold on alcohol rations inside the Big Brother house. I understand they're' reasoning. Well, up to a point. But if they're really supposed to be living together in some kind of reality situation, why can't they have alcohol? They are adults after all. So what if they get drunk. Let those chips fall. I'll never understand CBS' s incessant need to micro manage everything right down to what we can see on the paid for live feeds.

I was actually kind of surprised that we were even allowed to hear any of these details about the Jury House. Big Brother's constantly censoring them all. In fact they seem to be censoring more and more content all of the time. I don't know about you, but I hate feeling handled. I especially resent the fact that the live feeds are being censored. For one thing, it's false advertising. Don't tell viewers to pay for the live feeds because they'll get to see what's really happening behind the scenes. Because that is basically a lie. The house-guests are constantly being monitored and the live feeds are heavily censored. We are constantly being cut off, and shut out of all of the good stuff. They seem to like saving the juiciest bits for themselves.

Finally, The finale. Finally the jury gets a chance to interrogate them. I just loved that Julie used that word. Because I was just dying to see a real interrogation. If only we would have. But no. We see a very managed, edited show. I wish we could have seen the actual interrogation when it actually happened. But that's taped, and heavily edited. I wish we could have heard so much more. I'm not quite sure why we can't. I feel that we're missing the best stuff. And as usual the big Finale is totally rushed.

One thing's for sure, Dan sure got to Keesha. You could tell she was still upset. She looked a little bit broken and brittle at the end. Dan sure did an effective job of getting inside her head during that last night spent in his HOH bed. Oh I know nothing happened. But he was able to totally isolate her from the others. He kept her to himself. So she was still hurt and royally pissed off at Memphis when she left. Which, for Dan, was time well spent. Between her and Renny, and Libra and Michelle, Yeah Dan got her vote as well, they were able to spread their righteous indignation about Memphis around. I mean Memphis didn't get even one vote! And how many people did Dan screw over? Cause I lost count. Yet somehow they all respect him for that? Why? I'm sorry. I just don't get that.

Of course Keesha thought that Dan played a better game. She felt Memphis slid his way through. But Jerry felt that although he flew under the radar, "Memphis let Dan do all the dirty work. Memphis was every bit as responsible as Dan was. It was many things that Memphis did that got him to the end. He showed a tremendous strength maneuvering Dan and others to do the dirty work for him." I really don't think Memphis deserved all that credit. But I was happy to hear someone defending him. I just hated that it came from this man. Because Memphis said so many ugly things about him. And I don't know what happened to April. She said she thought Memphis played a better game. Yet she voted for him in the end. Why? April said Dan was the more insensitive one. I totally agree. Come on, don't tell me that I got Dan totally wrong. Renny defended Dan's behavior by saying, "He's a very, very immature young man for his age."

But it was the little things, like this statement, that made me blanch. They were all tickled and pleased as pickles with themselves when Dan asked Memphis this about Jerry. "You'll be able to slice him, right?"

He was talking about sending Jerry home like he was talking about wielding a knife. Like he was making sure Memphis still had the stones to do it, and do it right. Right? I couldn't even make up such an awful choice of words. It's what's made me question Dan's sensitivity. Because to me that really made him sound a tad bit 'disturbed.' Even Memphis, looked momentarily puzzled. Of course this doesn't excuse Memphis's negative words too. They basically both acted like little, little boys when it came to Jerry. But Jerry said some pretty horrible things too. So no one comes out of this house smelling clean.

I was really disappointed by the remarks from the three non-jury members to the jury. I say three because we never got to hear from Angie at all. I would have liked to have heard from Angie most of all. I couldn't believe what Brian told the jury. My mouth dropped when he said the boys never once were personal. He said it was all about game. I'm so sick of hearing that. Besides, it's basically bullshit! There were disgusting things said about everyone, by all. Not personal! How is that not personal? Brian said none of this mattered though. "Because this was just all a game to get where you both are." Well, bullshit about that too. I'm sick of that excuse. These are real people. They have real feelings too. That's always been my problem with reality T.V. too.

As for the rest of the jury, Libra was back to being herself. Not that I have the slightest idea who she is. She has the most amazingly polished public persona. She gives damn good interview. But she's almost an entirely different person when she forgets that she's still being viewed. I wasn't surprised to find her admiring Dan's more cutthroat like tactics. She said, "Big Brother is not best friends. There's no handbook to Big Brother. Outside of lying, cheating, stealing, manipulating, putting your mother in front of a bus, I mean, hey, you're trying to win the money."

See, but that thing about there not being a handbook for Big Brother is Exactly my point. No one ever said you had to win by being cutthroat. Yet the warped mode of behavior begun on "Survivor," has been carried forward, imitated, expanded upon and rewarded with success by everyone from the king of rude bullies; "American Idol's," Simon Cowell, spit, spit; to the maniacal Chef Ramsay on "Kitchen Nightmares';" to the new bitch in town, Tabatha, on Bravo's "Tabatha's Salon Takeover." Who said you had to be mean to be queen? Who said you had to reward lies and deception? Who said the ends justify the means? Not me, that's for sure.

As for the Big Brother show, even Bryan Ollie, a/k/a, 'Ollie' defended Dan. "To say that Dan lied to me, then betrayed me. That's just part of the game. I tip my hat to Dan for that." Libra was bobbing her head in agreement. And that was exactly what I was afraid of.

Michelle might have surprised a few people with the cleverness of her questions. I thought she asked the most carefully, crafted questions. She was able to hit quite a few marks with her remarks. First she threw a little jury house roulette at Dan. I loved that used his own words on him. Then, while asking why he chose to take her out of everybody on his luxury trip, she rather slyly says, Yeah, Memphis, by the way I went on the trip. Memphis's eyes, slide. Did a little piece of his trust in Dan die? Dan just chuckles, and pats him on the arm. But Michelle wasn't finished. Because now she lets Memphis and the others know that Dan said that back-dooring her wasn't his idea. "You said it was your alliances' idea. Was it your idea?" She asks.

"As far as back-dooring you.." Dan's answer was quick, and as always slick. It was definitely a non-denial, denial. But I think much of it flew by too fast for most of them to grasp. "The original plan was mine. However I could not enact the plan myself. Trusting that Keesha and Renny and Memphis were all going to vote you out? I didn't know that for a fact. Luckily, I felt confidence in my alliance. So, could I have back-doored you without their support? Definitely not. Do I take credit for that idea? Some of it."

In other words: Yes.

Oh, but Michelle wasn't done. Because then she tells Dan, with her Memphis question, that she and he were in an alliance. I have to admit, it was good to see Dan's mouth drop. Finally he looked surprised. Unless that was an act. Michelle wanted to know why he should get the money when he told her he purposely didn't win some of the HOH competitions. Of course Dan's guilty of that exact thing too. Perhaps the most strategic answer Memphis gave was his answer to this. "Maybe winning HOH wasn't the best plan for me." April seemed to be agreeing with him.

Dan, never one to that an opportunity pass, took a final stab at Memphis by barging in on one of his answers. Once again Memphis passively allowed it to happen. Dan said maybe Memphis didn't win the last HOH, "Because he didn't want to win the final HOH competition."

It took a lot of nerve to do that. To say that. Especially as Dan engineered, or at least hoped for that fall so he wouldn't have to have Keesha's blood on his hands. He didn't want to be the mean man voting her out. He wanted to be the one holding her hand. Memphis totally, and willingly took the heat for that. He let Dan make him the villain. He willingly did that. He was still doing that even during their questions. Why didn't he defend himself instead? That just boggled my mind. Because it was a thousand little cuts like this that add up to Dan's winning.

Memphis just let it all slide by. And he did it with a Memphis smile, thanking Dan the whole damn while. You know, Dan should actually pay Memphis for playing such a willing villain. Then again, I guess he has in a way.

Memphis seemed totally confused about Keesha's hurt right up to the end. He couldn't see why? Why? Why, she couldn't see that it was just all a business arrangement. Right. Cause who would get mad about that? That's really why Memphis came in second. Because Keesha's feelings were hurt. Jerry's were bruised too. Both of them felt embarrassed, blind-sighted and used. Keesha trusted Memphis. She believed Memphis. And yes, she believed in him too. She was far more upset over the cold, cowardly sting of Memphis's betrayal, than by the prospect of losing the big money. At least initially, anyway. The same thing goes for Jerry. Actually, the same thing probably goes for them all. All of the members in the jury felt they'd been done wrong.

So in the end they can say this was all about money, but emotions fueled decisions too. That's why I wasn't surprised to hear Jerry say this. "I'm making my decision based on Kindness." I loved that Jerry decided to cast his vote based on a human emotion; especially one like kindness. That's something you would have never heard from some of the monsters in BB9. Despite everything, Jerry still voted to award Dan. What kindness did Dan do to warrant such an award?

Is it bad that I got a secret thrill when I found out that the Q& A went badly for Dan? I thought that maybe the votes would follow that vibe too. I thought we might be surprised. But alas I was wrong. In the end when all the votes were in, every single one of them was for Dan. How did that happen? "Where's the love?" Memphis asked. Why was the vote unanimous? It made no sense to me. Neither does Big Brother's Finale hurry. They all but fast forward in a flash. It goes by so fast. Why the hurry? I'll never understand that. They drag out that least week until we want to tear off our skin. Then, when it finally gets interesting, they race to the finish. I always want more. I want to see them standing around together mingling some more. Where was Ashley? I saw Monica rush up to hug Dan. In fact Dan's family was identified in the audience. But I saw nothing for Memphis. Did Big Brother know ahead of time? Did they know Dan would win?

Memphis wasn't even angry, in the end at Dan, for taking Michelle on that trip. What does it take to piss him off? Oh, I know, Jerry knows. Forget a finger, Dan had Memphis wrapped round his whole hand. What, I wondered, would Memphis feel when he found out about the rest? How would he feel when he found out that Dan was America's Player? Would he care? He did not. I think by the end Dan totally cemented a feeling of trust with Memphis. So Memphis totally forgave him everything. I'm all for forgiveness so I can't find fault with that. Besides, Memphis owed Dan a little bit too. How else would he have ended up in the final two? Cause I don't see Memphis doing it on his own. Do you? I think it was a mixture of blind trust, and dumb luck. Memphis may have fallen into that money.

I wonder if the two new best friends will remain Renegade friends? Will they still be best friends after they've watched the show, and all is revealed? Will they still take that trip to Vegas together? Will their girlfriends get along? When Memphis's girl, Ashley shoots her gun, will Monica tag along? Both guys were really looking forward to seeing their girlfriends. But Memphis was counting down the hours. While Dan seemed to be counting all the dollar signs in his mind. Memphis said some pretty wonderful stuff about missing his girl. Here's something he said that really moved me. It showed me more of who he is, or at least who I'd like to believe he is.

During their last day together inside the Big Brother House, Memphis said he missed his girlfriend so much, he almost didn't care about the money. He just wanted to walk out of the house and into her arms. He'd already resigned himself to second place. Said he'd be happy, and lucky to have the 50 K and the car. He just wanted to walk away from it all with his arms wrapped tight round his girl.

After the Finale, Memphis was all smiles with 'House Calls' Gretchen Massey. He said he never expected to come out of the house with a best friend too. He didn't even mention the money. Who knew Memphis was so sentimental?

So, do the Ends Justify the Means? I don't think so. Can one do anything, just because money's involved? My answer's the same.

I just don't believe that Big Brother, and Reality T.V. shows like it, are just games. As long as people are involved, feelings are involved.

So I can't see this as a game. But I do hear it as a song that Dan has played masterfully.

Memphis didn't know the words. But he could hum along. And Dan played him like a fiddle. I can almost see Dan singing, La la la la..all the way to the bank.

But others weren't quite so lucky. They didn't end on such a high note.

I watched Michelle's eyes when they announced the 'twenty-five' grand Jury prize winner. Because the cameras zoomed right on in on them. They knew how important, and possibly life changing that money could have been for Michelle. They also knew that her eyes would tell the tale. Michelle's eyes never lie.

I watched her eyes glaze over because of course she doesn't win. You see a little piece of hope die.

No, it's Keesha who wins. I don't begrudge her the money. But it was still a shame. Michelle needed it so much more.