Tuesday morning dawns early for the BB HGs—or, at least, early for them if not early for the rest of us. Around quarter after nine, BB issues a reminder that today is the day the HGs must vote in the DR. Early risers, as usual, are Jack and Jun, followed by David who heads outside to the pool, dunks his head in, and then wanders over to the hammock to chill until voting time. When Dana wanders out, he takes his opportunity before the votes to work his magic: taking her aside, David tells her that not only does everyone believe she is double-crossing them, but that even the Stooges have agreed to make her their number one target for the following week. She is understandably upset (“I am so mad that everyone was playing me all week!”), but David gives her the chance to “redeem” herself. He tells her very simply that they plan to vote out Michelle instead of Erika, and that even without Dana’s vote, they have five votes—enough to evict Michelle. However, they would prefer to have Dana’s vote, as well, so that her “loyalty” to them could be proved; a 6-2 vote would also send a clearer message to the Stooges that they simply don’t have the numbers to be pulling the power trips they’ve been having fun with for the past week. He also offers that Dana go to Jun to have everything he has told her confirmed. When all is said and done, Dana agrees to vote with their original alliance, but warns that if anyone is messing with her, she will be “***** pissed” next week (or rather tomorrow after the HOH competition as new weeks are generally defined in the BB shack). She further threatens David, “If I go up next week, I’ll kill you David.” He drolly responds, “That’s fine.”

Also interesting to note about their confab: David admits to Dana that he asked the Stooges to let him use the veto to then have Jee nominate her, but he qualifies it by saying that he only did it to feel the Stooges out—to see where she stood with them; they turned down the idea, he said, because they’d target Dana ~next~ week. What is laughable about this is that David actually had every intention of getting Dana out this week if he could, whereas Jee has readily admitted in the DR that, despite what he tells Dave, he wants to keep Dana around because he thinks he can use her.

As soon as their conversation breaks up, Dana heads to the bedroom where Justin is, sits on the edge of the bed next to him and holds her head in her hands. Justin asks her if everything is all right and she replies, “No…yeah…never mind. Man, just when I thought I had this place figured out… Man, this is ~not~ a good week to be premenstrual! I hate BB.” Way to create suspicion, Dana. To her credit, however, when Justin asks her what is going on, she only answers, “Nothing.” Soon after, she makes a beeline for Jun, who corroborates Dave’s story/plan in whole. She listens to it all again and then mutters irritably, “My problem with it is that no one told me this week. It’s irrelevant, but…it’s there.” Once Jun leaves, it must be time for some quiet contemplation? Ha! Dana heads right over to the next person who will hear her bitch—and then again and again and again. Dana is one of those people who needs to draw everyone around her into her misery to try to make herself feel better. Inevitably it won’t work; it only makes everyone, including herself, all the more miserable. Indeed, it’s not long before we see her begin to cry.

The DR votes have been taking place all throughout this and Dana is called for her turn around 10:30am. It looks like Dave’s plan worked—she had no time to talk to the Stooges before casting her vote and really, is she so stupid to go against what is clearly the majority? I guess we’ll find out. As Dana takes her turn in the DR, Alison and Nathan laugh about her “breakdown” (because she cried a bit) and how stupid she must feel. Seriously, as much as I can’t stand Dana, listening to these two be so cruel and disgusting makes them no favorites in my eyes.

Meanwhile over in the kitchen, Jun is telling Dana about a sex dream she had. Apparently everyone in her room heard her having it because she made some, um, interesting sounds during it. She says frankly, “I’m telling you, I need sex.” The morning is sprinkled with jokes about Jun’s “orgasm,” and she takes it all in fairly good humor. The two women head off to one of the beds and lie down together where Dana begins to cry again. Not only is she pre-menstrual and the stress of the game-play is getting to her, but the PB&J diet is breaking her down. “I am miserable, ***** miserable…” Jun attempts to soothe her by saying that the other HGs had to keep her in the dark for strategy reasons, but Dana won’t be consoled so easily (it’s not so much that she is angry, but sad). They discuss Erika, who they agree isn’t “so bad after all.” Dana in particular second guesses herself because she never gave Erika a second chance. Dana also states that her crying-stint from earlier that morning (the one Alison and Nathan took so much joy in making fun of) was “all an act to get people to feel sorry” for her.

Alison joins the little chat-party in the bedroom (Michelle joined earlier) and tries to reassure Dana that no one will go after her this coming up week. Dana says, however, “I’m not stupid.” She knows that no matter how she voted, she would end up looking like an “*****” to one of the groups (“I’m going to look like a ***** bipolar psychopath”). It was a test, and she didn’t “***** like it.” By this point Alison and Dana are alone, and Dana remarks that David is now the best player in the house (her words: “***** Columbo”). Nathan simply wasn’t “man enough to take the reins” and he made too many deals with too many people. Once down to seven (in their ideal plan: Alison, Dana, David, Erika, Jack, Jun, and Nathan), they wonder which side will get Nathan: Alison, Dana and Jun or David, Erika and Jack? They think they could get him, but being as apt as he is play all sides, they consider taking Erika over and making it four women against three men. Of course, all this is just idle speculation right now.

Over the course of the day, the choice of feeds generally alternate between Dana talking about how crabby she is and warning people individually not to cross her, and members of the original alliance pleasurably contemplating what a surprise Michelle’s eviction will be for the Stooges. Just after noon, “Erika goes to the hammock to sit and watch the tortoises in their pen. Is it just a coincidence that both come over to the fence at her feet and try to get through it? I didn't see her with any food for them. Erika just sits and ponders the meaning of life; them in their little pen, her in her little house - both dependent on the whims of others for their continued existence. Perhaps not.” (That quote is courtesy of Phantom, one of our all-time best updaters!) Most of the HGs take naps. Some play cards. Some strategize: Jee wants Alison and Nathan up next, with Alison going (if the Stooges have their way, the last six HGs will all be male). Some engage in delusions: Robert believes that David and Jack won’t mess with them; he will feel comfortable if either of them gets the HOH (ahhhhh, thanks for the laugh Robbie!). Some are driven by their boredom to strange antics: David snorts into his microphone, sings various little ditties, and plays with a stuffed bear and some of the rubber ducks. Eventually his singing provokes a FOTH which lasts close to fifteen minutes.

When we come back, David and Nathan are chatting, and all us feed-freaks enjoy a chuckle when David tells Nathan that there are people (*ahem*) who actually type out everything they say and post it on the internet for other people to later read. While Nathan thinks this was pretty cool, David wonders, “Who does that?”

Some interesting bits from the course of the afternoon and evening to note: David has had to give himself an IV. Ew (that’s freaky for those of us who hate needles). Alison mimics her brother’s impression of a “retard” and Jun and Michelle laugh at it. The three then fall to talk about their brothers’ drunken antics, one of which includes Alison stepping in her brother’s urine beside his bed on Christmas morning. Ew again. Jee, Justin and Robert remarkably believe that they have this game sewn up. They talk about the prize money and how they will share it as if they have already won it. Michelle, meanwhile, like, says she is, like, the youngest person ever on BB, you know? And though she, like, tries not to think of her parents and like, tries to be independent, it’s, like, difficult, you know? (Actually, that is sort of sweet.)

To pass the time, games are the name of the day. After the guys finish playing a particular game of marbles and try to think of another game to compete in, Jun jokes (paraphrased), “Why don’t you just get a ruler, measure your dicks and get it over with?” Jee responds to this, obviously not getting her point, that men don’t actually do that; “do you girls go around measuring your *****?” The HGs then choose to make toys out of condoms by blowing them up or filling them with water; David pops some of them and then attempts unsuccessfully to stretch one over his head (à la Howie Mandell according to one poster).

A bit later, Jun lounges outside in the hot tub and says this year’s cast of BB4 doesn’t measure up to previous years, and if she were watching at home, she would be disappointed (“I’d be like, what the *****, what is with all these high-school kids?” BB goes to FOTH…lol!). Robert, however, takes this opportunity to ooze some charm and grease Jun up: “You are smart, fun, good casting.” Over by the pool, Justin cannonballs into the water, and when Jee follows suit, he almost misses the pool! Jun reacts, “Julie would have said, ‘HGs, as you know, Jee had to be hospitalized for severe head trauma.’” Justin drenches David, who is sitting in the hammock, as he jumps in the pool, but Dave only laughs and says that Justin got him “good.”

More notes of interest from the evening: The HGs get some new T-shirts for tye-dying and some paper to use for origami; they later try their hand at the Japanese art. Robert mentions to Jee that he has “had” over 100 women; Jee says he has had about 30. “Yeah, but I am older than you,” Robert says. Jee gets a little soused. Some of the ridiculous things to spew out of his mouth: “As the weeks go by, I am getting tougher and tougher.” “It was meant to be, kid; you, me and Justin hooking up like this in the house.” He blathers on about how proud their families will be of them when they win everything and will be chanting, “The Dream Team, the Dream Team, the Dream Team!” Oooookay, Jee. I’d say that anyone listening to this must be humoring him by agreeing, but it is Robert —and he probably believes it, too.

The day is winding down and the HGs are readying for bed earlier than usual in anticipation for the early vote tomorrow morning. Alison, when talking to Jun and Robert before bed, tells them that she will head to bed “as soon as they stop lovemaking in (her) room” (referring to Dana and Justin). Robert asks her if she is jealous, but she answers, “Justin is a nice guy. I don’t get jealous. If I did, it would have been awhile ago. Been there, done that.” Dana and Justin are, in fact, getting fairly close in the Blue Room. They are massaging each other and joking about “***** each other.” But don’t think they are the only ones to have any fun! Other HGs wander in over time, and Alison soon lies down to allow Robert to massage her (ew, ew, ew!). They all joke about Jun’s dream again, but Jun turns the tables when she makes fun of Jee and how he pleasures himself… 1-2-3-4-5, 1-2-3-4-5. Could there be some validity to the joke? Jee sure gets upset at it.

Dana, Jee and Justin all admit that they enjoy a little bit of herbage once in awhile. Or many awhile if you are Jee who smokes at least four times a week or Justin who “goes through an ounce in three weeks sometimes with the help of (his) friends.”

Strategy talk continues into the night, but since the votes are cast, it mostly has to do with how the Stooges will react to Michelle’s eviction on the morrow. Jack thinks that they can weave a story about having promised Erika not to vote her off in a deal made the previous week, while David doesn’t think that there is anything they can do to mollify the Dream Team (ha! I love it. They really are dreamers). As for Dana, they believe that she is firmly on their side now and look forward to her competing like a madwoman for the HOH (these might be some premature congratulations, in my opinion; just because Dana was forced to vote one way this day does not mean she won’t head right back to the Stooges if she wins HOH).

Eventually, over some lame jokes (What is Bruce Lee’s favorite drink? Wah-tah! What’s the difference between a bonus and a boner? Michelle will blow your bonus), the HGs snuggle into bed and drift off into soft, inconsequential chatter and eventually sleep. Another day is done, and tomorrow so too will a HG be done. Will Jee get his way and will Erika be evicted? Or will sweet, naïve Michelle be taken advantage of in order to send a message about numbers?

Well, you already know. Heh. And so do I, but in my summary world, tomorrow is still yet to come…