Saturday morning dawns clear with, what must be for three of the HGs, the agonizing reminder that Alie has won the POV for the week. It’s Day 64 for the HGs, and immediately upon wakening and entering the kitchen, they are informed that they are under an inside lockdown and cannot enter the backyard. The HGs eat breakfast, recline on the living room sofas, nap in their beds, and generally look as though today will be a sad repeat of the boredom they suffered yesterday.

Speculation over what the upcoming luxury competition will involve is the topic of conversation this morning, but the actual competition doesn’t start until half past noon. Robert exits the DR with a sheet of paper and heads to the living room where the women are waiting. “Are you ready for the best luxury competition you have had?! This prize blows everything away!” And FOTH.

Happily, the FOTH is only brief (must have been for instructions and preparation), and the feeds come back in little time. The female HGs dress rather reluctantly in prisoners’ uniforms complete with little caps (Alie: “I feel like a wiener!”), while Robert only grins with the knowledge of what the prize will be and dons his convict clothing. Outside, the backyard has been transformed into a prison of sorts with cages, balls and chains.

And what is the prize that Robert is beaming about? A ride in the Goodyear blimp over L.A. for the two HGs that win the competition. Sounds exciting to me, but the women aren’t happy at all. Robert wonders what they were expecting, and Alie remarks, “Previous shows get cars—we get a ***** blimp!” After Robert reads the rules several times over (due to a few flubs and also to get the women to cheer louder), we learn that the competition is as follows: the HG must put on a ball and chain and complete an obstacle course. The course includes a swamp (the pool), a force field (a bungee wall), barbed wire (through mud), a sewer pipe to “outside”, two security gates, and a final button which they must press to record their time.

Robert is the first up, and as he scrambles through the course, Jun yells, “Run, Forrest, run!” He clocks 1:58. Erika is up second, and though we cannot see her in the obstacle course, we can tell from Alie and Jun’s sarcastic comments (calling Erika a “cheetah,” doing a mock wave, etc.) that Erika isn’t really trying to win the competition. Her time is 2:49. Jun is third, and despite professing not to want the blimp ride, times in at 1:20 (she begins the course by yelling that she has to “escape the Big Brother house!!”). She is guaranteed a ride. Alie is up last and, proving to be the strong competitor she is, clocks in with the fastest time of all: 1:02. It’s her and Jun to the blimp! Now, y’all know I am not a Robert fan, but if he wanted it so much, and the women could care less, why couldn’t they have given it to him?

Robert announces soon after the competition is over that Alie and Jun’s blimp ride will be tomorrow, while America’s Choice will be in a couple of hours. It is after two at this point, and the HGs fall to eating, napping and lounging as they bore away another afternoon. Nothing much happens until the feeds go to FOTH at four o’clock. We assume that America’s Choice is being revealed (a cell phone was noticed in the house prior to this), and when the feeds come back in fifteen minutes, we realize that this was indeed the case. The winner? None other than Robert, who promptly heads to the HOH room, grabs his “Honeybear,” and dives into the bed to sob. “I didn’t know she would cry,” he says, meaning his daughter. The HGs leave the father alone, but BB isn’t as tactful as they call Robert into the DR.

The early evening chugs away. Robert, once over his grief, teases Alison about the blimp ride tomorrow: “Alie, have you ever seen the movie ‘Black Sunday’?” (The movie, apparently, involves terrorists and the Goodyear blimp.) Alison tells him to shut up and says that she is going to go “blindfolded.” Erika mentions that she was credited 50 seconds for her “balls coming undone” (for the veto competition, which would put her time at 1:59—still the worst). Erika and Robert agree that they will do some salsa dancing tomorrow. Jun comments that Jee will be happy with Carmen—she is younger, he can control her more and be “the man.” She also says that, because of their personalities, Jee should have been the “girl” and his sister should have been the “boy”; Jun also thinks that she should have been the “boy” in her family.

At half past seven, their Greek dinner arrives. They appear happy to receive it and quickly stuff their bellies full (no complaining from Alison tonight). Robert offers to do the dishes. Erika plays basketball alone. Alie wonders how America could “be ***** in love with Robert,” and Jun answers, “Cuz he has a kid. That’s the only thing.” Alie and Robert discuss strategy—who would vote for whom in the final two, etc. Robert insists that Erika was ~not~ going to vote Alie out. Erika gets a tad tipsy on some wine and flirts with the cameras as she did on a previous wine-infused night. She pleads her case with Alie and says that, if Alie has to keep Jun for strategic purposes, then so be it, but Erika never lied to her and never tried to get her out of the house.

There is ab work, there is chatter about the worst pick-up lines they have ever heard (a guy once said to Jun, “Don’t you know the best part of Caucasian is Asian?”), there is strategizing and HG-bashing. Alie professes to have known since Week Two that Erika and Robert had an alliance (wow, Alie, amazing since they ~didn’t~!). Erika and Robert both agree that they will come away from the Big Brother experience better people because they learned to forgive one another. Jun says that after Big Brother, she will never see Jee again. She then makes me laugh out loud as she says to Erika, who talks about the show’s motto being “Expect the Unexpected,” “The show was supposed to be about twelve strangers, not ten exes and three suckers.”

And so the night goes (and so it always does). Erika is upset that Alie has the veto. She is afraid that Jun is “filling her head.” Alison, being so impressionable, is apt to believe what Jun says, and though Erika calls Alie a “bitch” and says that she never liked her, she maintains that she never tried to oust her. Robert asks Erika to promise him that she won’t take Alison to the finals. Erika agrees but is really more concerned with just lasting the week—she thinks Alie mistrusts her and will evict her this week. Alie and Jun, meanwhile, bash the last couple remaining in the house and persist in believing that the two of them had an alliance since the beginning. “She’s in his room all the time. She totally ***** us, and she ***** herself. Does she think we’re that ***** dumb?” And on and on and on. Their bashing is becoming ridiculous. Erika is a “momma’s girl” and actually gets ragged on for caring for her ~dogs~. At one point, even we feed-watchers are not immune to the step-sisters’ vile as Jun spits out, “(Erika) is so concerned about whether or not the internet people like her. They are ***** sitting at home and never leaving their houses anyway!” Oh yes, I forgot, I have no friends, no life, nothing beyond BB and you, Jun!! How silly of me to forget (*gag*).

Eventually the night ends after some random chatter about TV shows and Scott (and how they were asked not to mention his name in the house anymore). One interesting bit to note is that BB apparently had asked Jun, who was “older and more educated,” to reassure Alison and Michelle that they couldn’t get genital warts from sharing the same toilet as Scott. Jun jokes to Erika and Robert that she came out of the DR after being told this and ran up to Alison and Michelle yelling, “Oh my God, you’re totally going to get it!” The three HGs then (obviously sans Alison) talk about how silly the two girls were for being so dramatic and upset about Scott’s confession.

By two in the morning, the HGs settle down to bed. Tossing and turning, no one but Alie seems to be sleeping well. Erika gets up to take some pills for her stomach (she has been having stomach troubles for the past few nights), while Jun whispers to Erika that she, too, is having “tummy” troubles. In time, however, steady breathing and gentle snores can be heard chorusing in a sleepy quartet throughout the house. Goodnight, HGs.