BB11 Recap August 25, 2009

Yesterday brought the long awaited POV Ceremony, which resulted in Jeff using the POV to remove Kevin from the block and replace him with Russel. At approximately 1:08PM BBT, the feeds return and we see one of the most vitriolic arguments in BB history as Jeff and Russ face off about what just took place inside. A calm and confident Jeff is perched upon the his usual smoking post, and tells Russ that he has to know that nominating him was a smart move on his part, and asks if he wants to talk now. Russel’s response is a promise to mop the floor with Jeff’s face when he arrives in the jury house. He calmly goes on to explain that what really make him angry is the threat Jeff made to he and Michele to find and kill their respective families if they betrayed the F4 pact they had just reaffirmed.

As the screaming match and escalating threats of doing physical harm to each other continues,. Natalie and Kevin bask in the afterglow of the success of their LML at the pool table.

Today is Tuesday, August 25th, 2009 and the 51st day in the house, and after yesterday’s explosive fight, we just have to hold our collective breaths to see how the next chapter unfolds.

The first wake-up call comes at 10:58AM BBT. Jeff, Jordan and Michele get up and make their way to the SR, change their batteries and head back to bed. Jordan putters around in the HOH bathroom and goes to the backyard to sunbathe.

12:09PM BBT: BB asks that Russel and Kevin change their batteries. Five minutes later the two oblige BB and return to bed. Russel does peek outside and sees Jordan in the pool and makes a pit stop before returning to bed.

12:55pm BBT: Jordan returns to the HOH room. Jeff is awake, but is cold and is still in bed under the covers. There is small talk about motion sickness on boats and a debate about whether Jeff’s HOH pictures actually look like him.

Jeff changes the subject by commenting that it feels like they have been in the HOH room forever, and he is getting used to the bed. Jordan says that it’s because she won last week. Jeff smiles and says he knows. He just needs a dose of reality.

Jordan tells him that she feels that they won’t be safe next week unless she wins HOH, because she doesn’t know what Michele, Kevin or Natalie will do. She tells him that if she does win, she will probably put up Michele and Kevin. Jeff is still in the process of waking up. Jordan tells him she’s going back outside. As Jordan is leaving the HOH, Jeff is still in bed watching the spy screen and tells her that he will be out there soon.

1:14PM BBT: When Jordan returns to the backyard, Russel is doing laundry, and she heads to the hammock.

1:18PM BBT: Russ tries to enter the DR. The green light didn’t come, so he heads back outside and gets into the pool. As soon as he does, BB calls him to the DR.

In the meantime, Jeff is still upstairs watching the spy screen and listening to Bob Marley.

1:29pm BBT: Natalie has joined Jordan in the backyard. Jordan tells Natalie that she warned Michele that she better not vote for Russ to stay. Natalie says they will all get an opportunity to let Russel know how they really feel about him. She’s never really gotten along with Russ. Jordan doesn’t understand why Michele is upset about Russ leaving. Natalie says that it’s because he was her partner in the game, just like she had Jessie. Jordan tells Natalie that she’s smart and will make it far [in the game.] Jordan thinks that being backdoored blindsided Russel. Natalie says the he told her yesterday that he knew 100% that he was going up, and warns Jordan they better watch out for Michele. She is pissed. Nat just doesn’t understand how Michele and Russ became friends after all the horrible things he said about her. Jordan says he wanted to team up with Michele because she was the brains and he was the muscle.

1:46PM BBT: Natalie called to the Dr. All four feeds are on Russ in the backyard, and then switch to Michele and Natalie in the kitchen, who don’t say a word to each other. Jeff is in the kitchen and says that he really zonked out yesterday. Natalie tells him that she slept “amazing,” but always does. Jeff tells her that she’s definitely a sleeper. They eat while making small talk.

1:58PM BBT: Jeff and Michele are sitting at the kitchen counter and Michele makes a comment about Russel. Jeff says that he’s sick of everyone listening to Russ campaign, and then goes off on Michele. The tone in his voice is very similar to what it was yesterday during his confrontation with Russel, and he tells her that when Russ came to her she should have told him, “You called me out in front of the house and tried to make me out to be a liar!” Jeff adamantly tells her that he can’t understand why she just didn’t just give Russ a big f*ck you!

Michele sits silent and listens to Jeff’s rant, gets up, touches his arm and tells him, “No worries this week,” and then heads to the backyard.

2:14PM BBT: Russ and Nat are on the couch in the backyard. Russ asks Nat what her favorite competition has been so far. She tells him “the cans,” [the last HOH]. Russ starts talking about the after party they’re going to in Las Vegas after the show, and asks Natalie about drinking while she’s there. Tells her that he always carries a flask with him and could hook her up. She tells him that her boyfriend will be there, so he will get her whatever she wants to drink. Russ says, “You think they’ll give you a bracelet or something?” She tells him no, because it won’t be a Big Brother event, and they would no longer have any legal liability. They’ll be on their own.

Talk turns briefly to the sequester house, and Nat tells Russ that according to Jessie, they can’t talk game while they’re in sequester. Russ wonders if BB takes those in sequester to places like theme parks. Nat says no. Russ says that’s great, he’ll be a third wheel.

2:22PM BBT: Jeff is on a chaise lounge watching and laughing at Kevin who is watering the “grass,” after filling the hot tub.

Russel and Nat are at the pool talking about college. Russ asks Nat if she’ll join a sorority, and she says yes. He asks if she will live in the dorms, and she tells him no, she’ll live at home with her dad. Russ wants to know which schools she applied to. Nat tells him that she was accepted to Berkley, Cal-Poly Pomona, but decided on ASU, which in her opinion is just as good as Berkley.

3:17PM BBT: Kevin is in the kitchen working on a fruit salad. Natalie joins him at the counter, and Kevin tells her that his man makes him a fruit salad every morning. Nat whispers, “Here comes Dr. Psycho Sleeper” as Michele come in the back door. Kevin cuts two pieces of watermelon, one from a seeded and another from a seedless watermelon and asks Nat to taste both and tell him which tastes better. Nat says they taste the same, and says she wants some nachos—real-ass nachos with jalapeños. She gets up to find the chips, and asks if she should use shredded cheese. Kevin tells her yes, or some Velveeta if we have some.

Michele leaves the room and Kevin asks if Jeff went up stairs. Nat tells him that Jeff’s in the DR. Kevin says, no, he came out of there, and Nat says then he probably did [go upstairs.]

There’s a brief silence and then Kevin says, “I was thinking… Nat cuts him off and says, “I was thinking last night and then whispers something I can’t make out…but it’s something about Michele possibly not using the veto next week if she wins it. Nat tells Kevin that he will have to talk to her and have her swear that she wouldn’t, and then second guesses herself, saying that Michele has sworn before and then doesn’t follow through, like when Chima told her that she wouldn’t put her up, but she had to swear not to put her or Natalie up, she swore on her husband’s life.

Kevin says emphatically that he doesn’t like any plan that hinges on Michele, and Nat agrees. Jeff comes downstairs and the discussion changes to which watermelon Kevin will use in the fruit salad. Nat asks Jeff if he’s going to work out, and he answers in the affirmative. Nat says it’s too hot out there. Jeff tells her that he’s got to get his mind right.

As soon as Jeff walks out the door, Nat goes back to agreeing that trying to deal with Michele isn’t a good idea, and it shouldn’t matter because they will have the two toughest competitors on the block anyhow. “It was just a thought.”

Kevin says, “I was thinking of framing Michele.” Nat says, “So was I, you know like telling Jeff, and then just make some sh*t up.” Kevin agrees. Nat: “And then just say that Russ told me this stuff.

Kevin: “I was thinking of telling Russel, because Russel’s like trying to get me to keep him, telling Russel, ‘Hey, I’m down if you can get Michele. And Michele commits and I go to Jeff and Jordan and tell them, ‘Did you know that Michele is trying to work a deal out with me to keep Russel?’ …The only down side to that is that she might run to Jeff and Jordan first saying that I’m …you know. Because they need to know that she’s like a back stabby...she’s not on their team. Or we can just make it up. Dude, Michele’s trying to get me on board trying to keep Russel.”

Kevin is still cutting fruit for the salad, while Nat is sitting at the counter. She brings up an objection that I couldn’t hear, but Kevin agrees. Nat says, “You just have to say that Russ says that he has Michele.”

Kevin tells her that won’t work, because Jeff will blow it off and think that Russel is just saying whatever. Nat agrees, and says she wants to “make up some lies about Michele saying something about…like last night when Russel told us basically that if Michele wins, she’s coming after them, which I don’t believe, but he [Jeff] will. Remember last night on the bed when [Russel] was telling us that? And I was no, she’s not.” Kevin walks to the sink to rinse the cutting board, and when he returns to the counter Nat tells him that he would have to tell Jeff that Russ came to him and said that he’s got Michele, and you’re like, well, she will have to come to me.

Kevin says that he doesn’t want it to be like Russel told me this and Michele told him that, and I say something to her and she goes running to tell Jeff and Jordan. He pauses, and then says, “Well, I can just tell Jeff, well he’s just desperate and making sh*t up…And then I was thinking like f*cking with the votes.

Natalie cuts Kevin off, “Dude, don’t f*ck with the votes, dude, because you don’t know what Michele and you don’t know what she’s gonna do.

Kevin: “Well I was thinking like about the votes right before it happens, like Michele, I am not voting to keep Russel, so that’s like one vote…

Nat sounds desperate now. “No, Dude, don’t f*ck with the votes.” Kevin laughs. “If I don’t stay, I’m gonna kill you. Do NOT do that! If you f*cking vote to evict me…Kevin tells her, “I’m not.” Nat says that if he does, she will stab him while he sleeps right in his heart. Kevin says he’s just playing with her, and she tells him not to joke about the votes. “Get that idea out of your head.”

They talk about the HOH comp and how they all have a chance. But Kevin says, “If for some bizarre reason Jordan wins, we need to get Jordan to get Michele out, not us. And actually, I’m going to confront Jordan and be like, Jordan, if you win HOH next week, am I going to go on the block? Because I need to corner her for her to give me her word [that]she would not.”

Nat tells him that’s not going to really do anything. Kevin says that he doesn’t see how it would hurt, though. Because she can just say she lied to me, but at the same time does she want to destroy a possible jury vote? Nat says that she doesn’t think Michele thinks like that. Kevin is quick to tell her, “Yes, she does. That’s why we need to get [Jeff and Jordan] on board about getting Michele out somehow. ” Nat agrees that they can try that.

Kevin says that he’s going to tell Russel that if anyone approaches him that he’s going to deny…You understand Russel that I cannot be exposed that I’m doing this, and he’ll get it.

Nat says that Michele would have to come to her, she’s not going to Michele. Kevin agrees. She would have to come and tell me that she’s voting to keep Russel. Kevin tells her that Russel encouraged him to just ask Michele, and he’ll find out she’s on board with you, just go up and ask her. “And I’m like, I’m not going up to her.” And Russel tells me that he understands, I think he thinks I’m stupid. “You know how he’s always talking about Jeff and Jordan being stupid for hanging out with us. And just the other night Russ was talking about how you were getting on his nerves, and now he’s like all, Nat-Nat and stuff.

Nat says that she knows. “I’m not as dumb as people think I am. I love the fact that people think, all the people in this whole house, everybody thinks I’m so dumb. Cuz I’m young, they think I’m dumb


Nat: “Well, I am 18”

Kevin: “NO YOU’RE NOT!”

Nat: “Well, I am 18, but that doesn’t mean that I’m naïve. That’s what I love, people think they can…because they think I’m 18, so they think I’m dumb.

Kevin lets the age thing pass, and talks about how Russel explained to him last night that once they get to final 4, the HOH gets to play again, “and I was like sh*t, I didn’t think about that”…”He says, like, Dude, you’ve got to think like two weeks ahead.”

[Throughout this conversation, Natalie is constantly shoveling fruit in her mouth as fast as Kevin cuts it. I can listen to her, but watching her eat makes me nauseous.]

Nat laughs and says we know that, Dude, that’s why you’re going home this week, because we thought two weeks in advance! Russel, we’re actually smarter than you, buddy.”

Kevin: “And he’s criticizing Jeff for busting his move too early, and that’s like you, Russel, you went too hard too early.

Nat says that Jeff didn’t bust his move too early, and Kevin says he knows, but that’s what Russel is saying.

Nat pops another grape in her mouth, and says, “I just want people to keep thinking that I’m dumb. I didn’t know you could play double [HoH] back-to-back. Like if Jeff would have brought it up, I would’ve been like what are you talking about? What do you mean? Explain it to me. How does it work?”

Kevin says that he’s playing the like-Dude-now-I-have-to-start-playing-the-game card.

Natalie tells Kevin, “Dude, like I know right now that Jeff has the money in his pocket. He does!” Kevin agrees, but adds, “If we don’t win HOH”. Nat, who evidently assumes that she will be the next HOH explains that she’s going to convince Jeff that he’s just a pawn through the whole thing. “My speech to Michele is going to be so horrific that he’s gonna think that I’m really gunning after her. I’m going to bash her, and later I’m gonna tell her …Nat sees Russel coming, gets off the stool and heads to the door, telling Kevin that she’s going to give him a chance to talk to Russel.

3:30PM BBT: Russel enters the kitchen and reaches for the slop bucket. He tells Kevin to not take it personal, but he’s staying away, giving them their space. Kevin asks why. Russ tells him that he doesn’t want them to have to take sh*t from “the other two” for talking to him. Kevin asks if he’s talked to Michele. Russ says that he “spoke to her last night and she’s going to talk to you.She’s just like you, she knows that she can’t trust them anymore.” Kevin says, “What? Russ says. “She knows that she’s at the bottom of the totem pole, and you’re even lower.”. Russ leaves to check the storage room for more slop. While he’s gone, Kevin continues to work on the pineapple he cutting up for the salad, lifts his head up and back so he’s looking up toward the ceiling, laughs and says “This is so perfect!”

Nat and Jordan come in. Nat asks Kevin if Russ tried working him. Kevin says, of course he did. “I love how he hasn’t talked to me the entire game and now he wants to talk to me all the time.” Nat says, “Not only didn’t he talk to you, but he wanted you out. He’s been pushing for you.” Kevin says, “Oh, I know. I don’t forget. I’m not stupid. Jordan, last night he’s like f*cking Jordan and Jeff are trying to be buddy, buddy with you now. And he’s like they were …” While Kevin searches for the words, Natalie jumps in and says, “Actually we have been talking, you [Russel] just don’t know that we’ve been talking.”

Jordan asks, “What all does he say?’

Kevin: “He was basically saying that you guys have been fake with us, and I was thinking, dude, Russel, I just caught you the day before this Veto Ceremony talking sh*t about Natalie. You know, like how she’s so f*cking annoying…”

Jordan jumps in and says, “You heard that too?”

Kevin says, “Yes, cuz of the whole bathroom incident and the poker.”

Nat says, “Yeah, I’m so annoying and sh*t, but now all of a sudden he’s my best friend and being super nice, and calling me Nat-Nat. He walks by and asks, ‘What’s up, Scrappy-Doo’? He puts his hand on my head.”

Jordan says that maybe Russ is just trying to be nice to Natalie, because if he stays and she goes he’ll have her vote, because he’s always thinking about the jury house.

Nat says that Russel hasn’t talked to her in over two weeks and now he’s my best friend.

Kevin says, “And here’s the big one, [Russ] said just so you know that out of all the guys I’ve never talked about you negatively. And he goes, just so you can remember, Jeff on several occasions has used the f*g word derogatively. And don’t forget Jordan, she says that’s gay all the time, like it’s it’s a negative thing.

Jordan says that she thinks she’s improved on that a lot. Natalie jumps in and admits that she was bad about using that word before she came into the house. Jordan admits that she did too, because everyone back home uses it. But she stopped after Michele told her that it offended her, and hasn’t used the word in a long time now. Kevin tells them that he could care less about the word being used that way, because he knows that they’re not being malicious.

Michele comes in from the back yard and talk immediately turns to the fruit salad. And Natalie, who has been sitting at the counter eating fruit through this entire conversation, announces that she’s going to have a tuna-salad sandwich for lunch.

When they know that Michele is out of hearing range, Kevin tells Jordan that he doesn’t want her to freak out on him, that he promises that he’s going to vote Russel out. “But I am…” Natalie completes his sentence, “Wants to tell you things, you’ll listen” [Aw, she must miss Jessie!] Kevin says, “Why not? I think it’s funny.”

Natalie says Michelle told her that Russ woke her up in the middle of the night wanting to talk to her. Jordan complains about how annoying Russ was last week when he was on the block, and warns Kevin that he’s going to keep doing that to him.

Jordan says, “You know he’s so paranoid right now, that’s why he’s doing that.”

Kevin asks if Michele told Nat what they were talking about. Nat says, “We’ve got Kevin, we just need to work him a little more.”

Jordan is sitting at the table eating, and says that he will be like this until the day of the eviction, like he did with her with Chima while she was putting her makeup on for the show.

Kevin tells the girls about a conversation he had with Jeff last night. He explained that he told Jeff that they haven’t played together as a team except when they were getting Ronnie out. he hasn’t really won anything, so he realizes that Jeff doesn’t really know if his word is good or not. But Jeff will know that it’s good when he votes Russel out.

Jordan tells them she tried to give Jeff a pep-talk last night. [And we all know how well that worked.]

Nat interrupts Jordan to ask her who she would rather vote out, Ronnie or Jessie. Jordan doesn’t hesitate to say, “Jessie—someone else could get Ronnie out.”

Nat says, “Really? Even though Jessie had never done anything to you and Ronnie had?” Jordan explains that she thought Jessie was a stronger player. Natalie announces that she’s going to take her foot outside and eat, and leaves Kevin and Jordan alone in the kitchen.

When Natalie closes the door, Kevin says, “So you had to give Jeff a pep talk?”

Jordan tells Kevin that Jeff is worried that people will think he’s a bad guy because of what Russel said during their fight yesterday about Jeff saying he would kill their families and he would look like a bad buy.

Kevin says, “No, it was a joke,“ but he does believe that Michele did take it as a real threat. But he is a firm believer in the truth, and it always comes out. That if Jeff truly didn’t mean it, that it will come out. If he truthfully meant it, that will come out.” What Kevin can’t believe is that Russ used that to bond with Michele, and built it up basically until she believed it was a real threat. “We’ve got to get [Jeff] out, because what kind of guy says that?”

Jordan explains that he had to save Russel to get Jessie out, and she’d rather have Russel here than Jessie. Kevin totally agrees with that. Jordan told Jeff that she thinks people don’t believe that he’s like that, that he’s up front with people and doesn’t lie. He just doesn’t want people to think that he’s like Russel, threatening people and stuff. Jordan honestly believes that the way Russel has acted with Ronnie and Chima that he’s really going to look like the a**hole, the mean bully-type guy.

Kevin agrees.

Jordan thanks Kevin for making the fruit salad and asks if he misses Lydia. Kevin says, “I do.” The clarifies that she was his best Big Brother friend. He considered her his friend in the house. He’s never met a girl like Lydia before—one “that was tatted up like that.” Jordan says that they probably bonded up like that so quickly because they were both on the say team. Kevin agrees, plus she was like, you’d look at her and think she’s all about rock ‘n roll, but she was actually more like me and about pop culture and stuff. He thought she was going to be wearing black all the time and being sad.

4:03PM BBT: Jordan tells Kevin that Jeff really misses the garden, and how he was always watering it. Kevin says that there’s probably a whole segment about it. [Of course, we know there is, and saw it on Sunday’s show.]

4:20PM BBT: Jordan has joined Jeff in the kitchen, and begins her version of the conversation she had with Kevin and Nat in the kitchen. Kevin told her that Russ was going on about Jordan using the word gay all the time.
[Contrary to the 4:20PM post in updates, Jordan never included Jeff’s name or mentioned the word f*ggot. She made it sound as if Russel’s attack was a personal one on her, not Jeff.]

Jeff raises his voice and goes off on Russel again saying, “Russ should look in the mirror before bashing somebody’s character. Who the f*ck is he to attack someone’s character? He says he has no real friends. I’m not surprised. I wouldn’t want the f*cker in my house. ” Russ came to me with the deal to get Jessie out of the house, and I took it to my advantage and he still didn’t see the light. Russel’s vote to keep Jessie was a slap in the face, to buy him a jury vote and proof that he’s looking way ahead. And, too, if Natalie’s gone, he moves up in order, so then he can be like Jessie, it’s me and you, let’s make decisions.

Jordan says that Russ will try to have an epic speech at elimination. Jeff says it’ll be hard for him to bite his tongue, because Russel will be running his mouth on live TV saying things that aren’t even true. Jordan says that Russ will probably say bad things about her too, and she’ll have trouble not saying anything, but they just have to smile and be quiet.

4:29PM BBT. Michele, Nat and Kevin are on the couch in the backyard. Kevin asks Michele, “Did you and Ronnie have a final-2 deal?” Michele shoots back, “F*ck no!” and then giggles that nervous giggle of hers. Nat tells her, “I’m a firm believer in what goes around, comes around.”

Talk turns to tonight’s poker game. Kevin wants real stakes, like the loser cleans the bathroom, cooks dinner, etc. Michele suggests that he put up his $10,000. Michele does her nervous giggle, and then adds that she doesn’t think she’ll play tonight. She says she’s played hundreds of poker games and has never won.

Nat turns to Kevin and asks, “If you win, will you put me up?

Kevin gives her a look like she’s lost her mind and says, “Whaaat?”

Michele asks Nat. “If you win, will you put me up?”

Nat doesn’t hesitate to say, “Yes!” She then turns her attention back to Kevin and asks him again if he would put her up. Kevin remains non-committal, and Nat tell him that she would put him up.

Michele says, “Me and Kevin up. Yay!

Nat asks Kevin, “What have you done for me in this game?”

Michele interjects that he voted [to evict] Jessie instead of her.

Nat says, yeah, but then he voted [to evict] me against Lydia. Nat continues pressing Kevin to tell her what he has done to help her in the game, explaining that she is loyal to people who help her out in this game. Jeff and Jordan have both kept their words to her, but what has Kevin done?.

Kevin appears uncomfortable and asks, “Where is this coming from?” And, then he says, “You haven’t answered if you would put me up!”

Nat finally says, “Yes. I’m just being honest!”

Michele laughs and tells Kevin that if Nat wins, it’s her and him going up.

Nat doesn’t disagree. She explains that it doesn’t matter who is nominated, it’s the people voting that count, and then smiles sheepishly at Kevin. Kevin rolls his eyes and tells her she basically needs to get over the fact that he voted for Lydia to stay, that he had to vote for her.

Natalie snaps back, “And that’s why I have to put you up. I’m just being honest and I hope you respect that. She now turns to jury votes, and explains to Kevin that if he puts her up, he will lose two votes in the jury, hers and Jessie’s.

Kevin says that he didn’t back-stab her, that she knew that he was going to vote for Lydia. “You’re tripping, Girl!”

Natalie gets on her high horse and challenges both Kevin and Michele to put her up next week, because it doesn’t matter as long as she has the votes to stay

Kevin has now left the backyard to go inside and take a nap. Michele and Natalie admit that they would put each other up, and both challenge the other by agreeing that they’ll play like hell for the POV.

Natalie explains to Michele that just because she would put her up, doesn’t mean that she would be her target, because she has bigger fish to fry. She explains that Russel has never been her target. Her target throughout the game was Lydia, but she never had a deal with Russel. She says, “I’ve had deals with three people in this house—Ronnie, Jessie and Chima. [Now that they are gone] I’m alone in this game. I have no one on my side. I’m fighting for myself. Kevin and me are fighting for ourselves.” She explains that Michele has to be in this game for herself if she wants to win, and needs to know who you want next to you if you make it to final two. “If I was next to you [in the final 2], I would get second place.

Michele listens, nods her head and mutters, “Uh huh.”

Natalie continues her Emmy nomination performance by telling Michele that they are at a point in the game that they need to back stab. Michele nods. “There’s only five of us left on Thursday.” Michele moves closer to Nat on the couch, and listens as Nat implies a possible final 2 deal between them.

Michele has that meek little smile of hers, but she’s obviously not comfortable, and attempts to be non-committal when she says, “It gets harder and harder every week.”

Natalie is pushing Michele hard. “If there are people [here] you know you can’t win against, you have to get rid of them. If you think you can win against me in final 2, then I’m the one who needs to stay.” That’s what Jeff’s doing this week. He put Russel up because that’s the best move for him in the game. He’s thinking about himself.

Michelle, who is either missing the subtlety of Natalie’s implication that it’s time to turn on Jeff, because she can’t beat him in the game or is smart enough to realize that she’s being set up, says, “Russel really screwed himself in the game. I’m glad I’m not going home this week.

Natalie agrees, and then for emphasis adds, “I know I’m not going home this week.

Michele complements Natalie by saying that the fact that she is still here is a testament to her strength, because her entire alliance is gone.

Jeff is now in the backyard getting ready to work out, and asks what Nat and Michele are talking about. Natalie raises her voice to explain the agreement that she and Michele just made to put each other up if they win HOH. Jeff says, ”I’m staying out of this!“

At least we are honest, right?” Natalie explains to Jeff that she wants to give him the respect and let him know what the plan is instead of thinking something else. Nat then turns her attention back to Michele, and says, “Like I said, just because I put you up doesn’t mean you’re my target.”

Michele says they are communicating without saying a thing.

5:03PM BBT. The conversation between Michele and Natalie ends. Natalie gets up to tend to her laundry. When Michele gets up and heads for the house, Natalie walks over and starts talking to Jeff as he works out. Natalie explains that Michele asked who she’d put up if she won HOH, so I told her it would be her on the block if I win, that it’s was an eye for an eye. Jeff seems pleased and tells her, “I hope you get it.”

Natalie, who is obviously pleased with herself in that moment, adds that she’s already got her speech ready. [And she does. What Jeff doesn’t know is that he will be in the green chair next to Michele. And, while the speech she delivers will be directed at Michele, Jeff—the avid fisherman-is the bigger fish being reeled in and prepared to be fried.]

Jordan joins them, and Natalie repeats the story for her.

Jeff’s anti-Michele attitude comes out and he wants to know what Michele is getting at by asking Nat who she will put up. “She’s a rat! She’s gone!”

[Jeff’s paranoia is so misdirected at this point that it’s comical—in a sad way.]

Natalie recognizes Jeff going off on Michele as an opportunity to throw her under the bus, and tells him that Michele told her that she wasn’t making a good case to keep her here. [Implying that she might vote to keep Russ.] “And I told her that I know I’m already safe, but I’m doing my laundry just in case.

Jordan tells Nat that she doesn’t even need to bother packing her bags, she’s not going anywhere!

Jeff says that he hopes the vote is 2-1, and then Michele “can go cry in a corner all week—Sneaky bitch!”

Jordan laughs at Jeff, and tells him he may have to throw someone off a cliff.

5:09PM BBT: When Michele enters the backyard, the Michele bashing and talk about throwing people off cliffs comes to an abrupt halt.

Michele starts talking about her workouts, and Jordan talks about the weird sounds [queefing—“vaginal fart”] that Michele makes when she works out. Michele can’t believe that Jordan told Jeff about that. Jordan says Michele told the whole world [via the live feeds] and told Nat just now. Michele says, yeah, but they’re girls. Jeff tells her that if it helps, he doesn’t care. Jordan says that Jeff is like one of the girls. Jeff asks why. She says “You smell my armpits, so… Jeff says, “What? Do other girls do that?”

5:19AM BBT: Camera 1 is alternating between: Nat looking smug and cool, playing with her sunglasses; Jordan looking bored and Jordany; Michele with a sour look on her face, like she really wants to explode on them and say, I yawn because you idiots are turning my brain to mush; Jeff picking his nose [DoneWithJeffJo]

5:22PM BBT: Russ is reading his letter from home. When he’s done, he folds it, puts it back in its envelope and puts it away.

5:24PM BBT: Natalie leaves the back yard and goes to the Red Room to tell Kevin that during her conversation with Jeff while he was working out, he questioned why Michele would ask her who she would put up next week. Jeff already thinks that Michele is trying to make a deal, and hopes the vote is 2-1, so he has a good reason to go off on Michele.

5:29PM BBT: Nat opens the sliding door to the back yard, leans out and imitates an announcement of a ceremony and says, Who want to…sit on the couch and do nothing?” The others find it mildly amusing.

Kevin joins the girls in the back yard. Michele asks how is nap was. He tells her it was good, but he only slept about 15 minutes. Michele says power naps are the best.

Michele asks them if they’ve seen the burn she got on her butt from the POV comp the other day. She pulls down her short and lifts her bikini to show them. The four of them have an extended conversation about the competition.

In the meantime, Russel is in the Splish-Splash room staring at the ceiling. Jeff walks into the room, starts whistling and gets something from a drawer. Russ is still staring at the ceiling.

5:44PM BBT: Michelle gets up and tells them she’s going to take a nap. As soon as she leaves, Nat comments that it will give Michele time to talk to Russel alone in the Splish-Splash room.

But Michele doesn’t go to the Splish-Splash room, she goes to the HOH to take a nap on the chaise. Jeff asks her if she’s fed the fish today, because he’s f*cked up the dates on the packages. He asks if she knows what time it is, because he’s thinking about cooking, but ops to lie down in bed and listen to music instead.

5:47PM BBT: Jordan tells Kevin and Natalie that she will be rooting for both of them in the HOH comp. Natalie says that she has to win HOH. Kevin says he needs to win too. They talk about what HOH comp might be, and no one has a clue, but think it should be a short one. Nat reminds Jordan that she’s playing too. She says she knows but she’s not good at questions, and the only reason she liked the Before and After was because she couldn’t see anyone else and could concentrate. Natalie says, “If Michele wins, I’m so screwed.: Jordan says no, you have POV, and we’re all play for it…She pauses, and changes course, telling Natalie that she thinks Michele will put “me and Jeff up to get revenge for Russel.” Natalie doesn’t agree.

When Jordan finally leaves, Kevin says, “You know Operation Throw Michele Under the Bus? Russ told me he’s not ignoring me, he just doesn’t want to make it look like anything’s up.” He tells Nat that he asked Russ if he had talked to Michele, and Russ told him that he had and Michele will come to talk to him in a day or so. They’re both giddy that their plan seems to be working, and will be able to go to Jeff and Jordan and complete the operation.

Kevin says that the downside to the plan is that Michele might run to Jeff and Jordan and tell them that he’s the one who wants to save Russ. He doesn’t want to have a repeat of the meeting of the final-four alliance last week, where they grilled both Michele and Russ, “Did you say this? Did you say that?”

That possibility doesn’t seem to faze Natalie, who falls back on her stock response--deny, deny, deny. Jordan returns, and all is quiet.

5:56PM BBT: Jordan comes back outside, and sits by the hot tub. Nat asks Kevin if he wants to play pool. Jordan says, “We’re you guys talking about me? Nat says no, and tells Kevin to rack them up while she runs inside.

At the pool table they continue their discussion of their Throw Michele Under the Bus plan. Nat thinks that they’re both in the Splish-Splash room right now and probably talking. [Michele is actually in the HOH room napping.] She tells Kevin that when she does come to him about saving Russ, he should tell her that he’s been thinking about it and agrees they need to keep Russ.

Kevin says that he thought about telling Michele that he will never vote to keep Russ and then be the hinky vote.

Again, Natalie warns Kevin that he better not mess with the votes, because Michele is dumb enough to vote to save Russ.

Kevin says if anything that just means that you go home, and Russ stays…[awkward pause]…he smiles.

Nat makes him swear on everything that he’s not going to do that. He promises her that unless she comes after him, nothing could change his mind. Nat shoots back, “Why would I do that? I want to go to the end with you. I would never put you up unless I have to put you up.” her that Michele is not dumb. Nat says that he better just vote Russ out, because the risk isn’t worth the reward. Kevin assures her that there are five people in the house that aren’t that dumb.
Natalie says that based on her conversation with Jeff, their operation may already be successful. Kevin said

6:00PM BBT: Jeff, Jordan and Michele are in the HOH. Michele is on the chaise, Jeff is lying on the bed, and Jordan is sitting on the side of the bed with her back to Michele and playing “handsies” with Jeff. Jeff asks if Jordan wants to nap. He tells her that if she’s stinky, she’ll have to be over there, motioning towards Michele. Jordan stifle a laugh, and gets a sheet off the other chair to lie on, because she hasn’t showered yet. Jeff makes more stinky comments. Jordan again tries to stifle her laugh. Michele is quiet, but awake. Jeff says he’s not going to throw stones. Jordan asks, “Where’s sweet Jeff?

At the pool table, Nat tells Kevin that she hasn’t forgotten that Jeff, Jordan and Michele have all put her up--Jeff twice, once against her best ally. That alone is reason to put all three of them up. Just because she doesn’t keep bringing it up doesn’t mean she’s forgotten. She reminds Kevin that Jeff put him up too. Kevin assures her that if he wins HOH, he won’t hesitate to put Jeff up. Nat reminds Kevin that Jeff is the obstacle to either of them making it to the end. He is their target. Nat: “I’m on the block and I’m 99% sure Russ is going out.” Kevin asks what’s the 1%, and she says, “You just never know.”

Kevin reiterates how cool it is that just after he and Nat were talking about Michele approaching him, Russ comes up and says she’s going to do it soon.

After brief FoTH, Nat and Kevin are talking about Operation Sleep Deprivation. The plan is to keep Michele up all night between now and Thursday, so she’ll be so sleep deprived and rattled that she won’t be able to compete well in the HOH. Kevin says the only drawback to the plan is Jeff and Jordan could see them doing it. Natalie tells him that 4AM or 5AM is the best time. Kevin says, “And if we get caught, we’re just playing around. But if it works, Michele might miss some questions.

They agree that Operation Hide Sh*t will be worked on, and that Operation Sleep Deprivation might start tonight. They try to figure out what the next HOH comp may be. Nat tries to remember what the final 5 HOH was last season. Kevin says something about hockey and Rennie being there.

7:09PM BBT: Kevin and Natalie are in the Red Room. They’ve been cleaning their blankets for 30 minutes with a lint roller, and talking about Natalie’s dad’s girlfriend.
Kevin: Have you ever gotten in a fight with her?
Nat: All the time
Kevin : Do you call her dad's girlfriend?
Nat: I don't have to call her anything when she's standing around.

Kevin: When we're watching big brother, it doesn't look like they're doing nothing
Nat : Because we only see one hour at a time, three hours in a week. In fact there's over 2,000 hrs a week you're not seeing. [Proof that Nat really is smart, and ASU is academically as good as Berkley!]
Kevin: Is that right?
Natalie does the math and comes up with 172 hours. Kevin corrects her and says it's 186 hours.

7:10PM BBT: With the exception of Kevin and Nat, the rest of the house guests are sleeping. Russ is in the Splish-Splash Room, and Jeff, Jordan and Michele are in the HOH room. Jeff wakes up, smells his arm pit, and then heads to the bathroom, comes downstairs to make himself something to eat, and then goes outside to smoke.

7:30PM BBT: Russel is up, walks through the Red Room and doesn’t say anything to Kevin and Nat. He ends up going outside. Jeff doesn’t acknowledge him, and he decides to play pool by himself. There is really nothing going on in the house and no conversation to report

Jeff finishes his cigarette, walks over the grill and starts scraping it down to cook pork chops. Russ is outside, but neither acknowledges the other’s presence.

7:56PM BBT: Jeff is at the grill, tending to his pork chops. Michele is now outside eating. Russ is lounging. Nobody’s talking.

8:17PM BBT: Everyone but Jordan is on the couch outside. Kevin is telling them about the company he works for. They do focus groups and campaigns to determine what kids think is cool and tie it to important health topics. He explains that they do quite a bit of work with LGBT, and they smoke a. lot. Natalie asks what LGTB is. Kevin explains that it’s an acronym for Lesbian, Gay, Bi-Sexual and Transgender.

Russel explains that cigar smoking is different from cigarette smoking, because smoking a cigar doesn’t actually mess with your lungs in the same way. When he was fire fighting, he’d be on a mountain for 28 days working with fires. He’d dip tobacco all day, and the nicotine curbed his appetite and kept him alert.

8:39PM BBT: Kevin went into Costco one day with his man's Costco card, but they wouldn't let him use it. He refused to leave the checkout lane, even after the manager said they couldn't let him use it. Kevin offered to bring his own card in next time as proof, they refused but Kevin wouldn’t back down. Finally they said he could use it one time and one time only, but then he noticed they accidentally only rang up half his sh*t, so he left before they noticed. Essentially didn't pay for half his stuff. The other hg's were telling him good for him for sticking to his guns like that and since he and his man were domestic partners, and registered as such, he should've been allowed to use it. [KR1]

Nat tell them that how she used to steal Pogs for her sister. [Giving her age away again. Pogs were popular in the early 1990’s.]

9:12PM BBT: DR leak. Russel is heard, “Yeah, you find out you’ve been backstabbed and it hurts…

9:26PM BBT: Kevin tells Russel he would like him to grow his hair out, and asks why shaves it. Russel tells him that he started shaving his head in Jr. High for wrestling. He doesn’t like long hair, it’s hot and sweaty. But if you shave your head, glasses are essential because they soften the look.

9:37PM BBT: Jeff tells Michele she looks like a swimsuit model.

Michele and Jordan are working out, and the rest of the house guests are on the couch. Not much going on.

9:48 PM BBT: Nat asks the other house guests what they would do if they could leave the BB house for one hour. Nat says that she would get a manicure and pedicure. Kevin said he’d look up some porn and jerk off. Russel said he’d get on his bike and go for a ride. Jeff: “I’d do the same as Kevin, but different porn.”

Talk turns to the peach vs. nectarine battle between Nat and Jordan. DR has been calling people in one by one and asking them about it. When Michele is called, Natalie says that when Jordan insisted that the nectarine was a peach, she called Michele over and asked her what it was, a nectarine or a peach? Michele was the dumbest of all because she said she thought it was a tangerine.

10:20PM BBT: Michele and Jordan are jogging. Jordan talks about how great it is that they’ve managed to make it this far when everyone in the “evil alliance” was after them. Michele takes the opportunity to reassure Jordan that she has no intention of putting her and Jeff on the block. She explains that she plans to get Kevin out first, and hopes that she’s on the same page as they are. Jordan agrees.

While the girls are jogging, Jeff and Russel are both on the couch, not speaking and working hard to ignore on another.

10:22PM BBT: For those of you keeping track. NATALIE ANNOUNCES THAT SHE’S GOING TO SHOWER, before the girls finish working out.

10:30PM BBT: Jeff has been playing solo pool, and invites Jordan to play. Jordan wins the game by default.

10:50PM BBT: Michele heads inside to take a shower. When she arrives in the bathroom, Nat is just out of the shower. Nat asks Michele how long it’s been since she’s taken a shower. Michele says she’s not sure, but thinks she’s showered three times. She’s glad she got perfume in her HOH basket because she’s been working out every day. Natalie confesses that she only took two showers during the week she was a Have Not. Michele gets in the shower, and tells Natalie that she can have some products she might want from her HOH basket. Jordan comes in and complains about her saggy shorts, and how they don’t fit her anymore.

11:25PM BBT: It’s really a slow night in the BB house. Jordan is taking a shower in the HOH. Russ is in the backyard playing solitaire. Jeff and Michele are in the kitchen sharing airport travel stories.

11:43PM BBT: Jeff is now in the backyard smoking. Russ is playing pool alone. Kevin, Nat, and Michele are in the kitchen chit-chatting. Jordan is still upstairs.

11:50PM BBT: Everyone but Russ is now in the kitchen preparing to play a game of BS. Nat goes outside and asks Russ if he wants to play. He looks at her and says, “Are you kidding me?” He asks Nat to play pool with him; she tells him she’s going play cards. He says, “Maybe a game of chess later.”

11:52PM BBT. Jeff, Jordan, Kevin, Nat and Michele have been playing BS since Nat came back inside. Russ is in the hammock. He’s very pensive and appears defeated.

12:01AM BBT: The card game continues, and everyone is having a great time. Jordan keeps messing up, and Jeff keeps correcting her.

12:12PM BBT: Jordan wins the first game of BS, which Jeff quickly renames BullF*ck! Russ comes inside to use the bathroom, and returns to the kitchen to make himself a shake and some slop. No one at the table acknowledges his presence, and the second game of BS begins.

12:49PM BBT: Jeff tires of BS and decides to teach everyone how to play 31. All goes well for a while, but by 12:54AM Jeff has lost his patience with Jordan, and accuses her of not paying attention to the rules. His voice is raised again, and Jordan is frustrated. She says that she didn’t pay attention when he was talking, and would learn while they play. Natalie says that Jeff and Jordan definitely cannot date, because they would be fighting all the time. Jeff agrees. Jordan wants to quit, but everyone tells her she’ll get it.

1:13PM BBT: Everyone but Russ is still playing cards. Jeff and Jordan are playing together with one set of cards. Jordan is very quiet.

1:25PM BBT: Natalie suggests that once they reach the final 5, they should agree to have fun together regardless of who’s on the block, and not have the evictee isolate him/herself like Russ is doing this week. Nat says that she asked Russ to come play BS with them, and he said, “Are you f*cking kidding me?” They agree. Nat says, “Of course, that’s not an excuse to nominate me. “ She’s been up four tmes already, and they should pick someone else.
Jordan is visibly upset, and tells everyone at the tablel that she’s going to lie down. Jeff says, “Whatever.”

1:32PM BBT: An excited Natalie tells Russ that she won the game. He hugs her. She asks if he wants to go play pool, and they head outside. Michele joins Jordan, and asks if she’s okay. Jordan complains that Jeff has no patience, and she’s tired of bickering with him. She doesn’t care, because she’s not a card player. Michele agrees that Jeff gets frustrated easily. Jordan says she’s going to sleep downstairs tonight and give Jeff some space. Jordan crawls into bed in the Splish-Splash room. Michele turns off the lights as she leaves the room.

1:45PM BBT: Russel is bashing Jeff and Jordan while he and Nat play pool. He makes fun of Jordan for walking around with her cookie dough, and says her thighs look like two seals mating. Nat tells him that she can’t say anything, she’s just grateful to be there. She says next week she’s playing against Michele, Kevin and Jordan, and if she can’t win then, she deserves to go home. Russ tells her that his speech is going to be as epic as Chima’s. Nat says that when Russ gets to the Jury House, he should tell Jessie to get the wine ready, she’ll try to send them a nice present.

In the meantime, Michele and Kevin are talking in the Red Room. Michele says she may go to sleep in HN room early. Michele asks Kevin if he's scheming. He says this is the first time on the block. Michele says that next week will be crazy as final 5. Kevin says it will be musical chairs after someone gets PoV. Michele says she's excited to be final 5 and that it's important to be positive. Michele says that nobody has gotten mad at Kevin and he's been great talking to people. Kevin says he's not really a people person, and that he's had to tone down his personality a bit so as not to piss people off. They talk about Yoga and exercise.

2:01AM BBT: While Kevin and Michele are inside talking about friendships and relationships, outside Nat is not only working Russ over for his jury vote, but is trying to get Russ to Speak to Michele on her behalf. Russ tells Natalie, “I can’t believe [Jessie] chose Ronnie over me.”

2:23AM BBT: Russel joins Natalie, Kevin and Michele in the Red Room. They talk about the season-5 competition where they burned their clothes and earned extra shopping time for every article of clothing they burned. Meanwhile Jordan is laying down in splish splash room in the dark listening.

3:30AM BBT: Michele is the last house guest awake, and she’s playing solitaire at the kitchen table. She finally goes to bed at 4:08AM BBT.

6:26AM BBT: Kevin and Natalie are up and working on Operation Hide Sh*t. They have a bowl of oranges and are looking around the kitchen and living room for more things to take.

[Thanks, as always, to the best updaters on the web for being able to stay awake through what was a very boring night. You guys ROCK!!!]