Another installment from Joker's Updates resident Big Brother Dissident. This time, a discussion of pre-season anticipation.
Don't ask me how, but somewhere over the years I have managed to develop patience where TV is concerned. Other areas, not so much but we won't go there. Why am I talking about patience? Because we've entered that wonderful period of Big Brother where we can’t' wait for it to start. The rumors are flying. People are posting fake or real good-byes. Oh - and if you make it on the show - do yourself a favor, don't post a goodbye. I suspect that's a really good way to get dumped from the show at the last minute and replaced with one of those actor/model type recruits we all seem to hate so much. I believe they call this maneuver "Violation of Contract" but I could be wrong.
So all of you are out there asking who is going to be on, looking for clues, looking for hints. Checking with people you know tried out for the show. And there is the speculation on who will/might return. "Love" those too. Yeah - NOT! For this viewer All Stars was something of a bust (minus Dr. Will Kirby and Mike Boogie), and every season since that we've had some previous houseguest make any sort of return has annoyed me.
What I don't get is why, when previous houseguests are allowed back in the house as contestants they are not ganged up on by the newbies and voted out? I'm serious. They had a shot. They had their turn. Yes I know you want their brilliance in your alliance but they are going to try to ride you and your buddies all the way to the end and dictate what you can do and who to vote for and you'll find yourself stuck with them at a point when you really want to get rid of them. And had you merely voted anyone who had been on the show before out the door the minute they walked in - well you wouldn't be in this situation now would you.
I will admit that last year with SIX returnees was a bit unfair in the numbers game because they immediately ganged up (sorry, calling it what it was) and played the numbers game. Of course the rest of the houseguests DID outnumber them, especially after the great EVEL DICK disappearance but by then the veterans were pulling strings and people let them.
This leads me to my favorite pre-season part of Big Brother. The liking or disliking of the season's houseguests based on the 10-30 second snippet they allow you to see, interviews, photos and lists of likes/dislikes/statistics. I know danged well that you cannot predict based on that little information that you will like or dislike a houseguest. That someone's voice by the third day of feeds has you ready to bomb the backyard of the compound. Or that someone else had a great snippet and looked great on paper but is, in the reality of the game a world champion napper. By the way - if I were to rewrite the rules of the game - napping would be verboten and penalties would be generated for doing so. This prudish, Evangelical, Bible-thumping, Midwest girl will take covert hanky-panky with sound effects over anyone who naps (yes, I'm looking at YOU, Jessie).
As for the who I want to see back in the house - NOBODY!. I want a group of strangers. You know, people who don't know each other outside the house. No partners. No teams. And I don't want to see fame seekers. Let's see some real folk. And a wider age range. Yes, I know that you think that 40-somethings don't look as good in a bikini but it might just make for interesting viewing. Something else I don't want to see - the unitard in any form or any other 'punishment'/'reward' costumes.
I'd also ask for a group of people who can consume food without smacking, chewing with mouth open, talking with mouth full and other disgusting forms of table manners - but I know I'm not going to get that.
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