Group Date One
In attendance were...
DeAhhna, Lindsey, Stephy and McCracken
Jenni and Sarah missed the photo op...but were in attendance
Where on earth could they be going? To the greatest show on earth. DeAhhna says she has NEVER been to a REAL circus? Unlike all the fake ones you see all over the place. Geesh. Poor thing how deprived.
When they get to the circus the first thing the girls do is feed the elephants. One elephant (my hero!) blows snot on Sarah.
Sold in fine stores everywhere! Get yours today!
After that great moment, Brad takes the gals up to a luxury box. Huh? A luxury box...at a circus?? What kind of freak show is this? Oh wait, its a circus...silly me. All circuses have luxury boxes...what was I thinking?
The girls do some little bitty stunts: tight rope walking, juggling, stepping on the clowns balls...oh wait...
Anyway, Jenni shows she has gymnastics abilities by doing some tumbling in a tube top. She does a round-off, back handspring, back tuck...and yes the shirt stays up. Her years as a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader paid off. They have to learn to keep those little shirts on some way, she remembered how. YOU GO GIRL!
Brad's jaw drops to the floor and he starts talking about how he just gets all gitty around her. They share a moment alone, out with the elephant dung...it's all romantical and stuff. "sigh"
Brad next victim is Stephy. (Rose McGowan) who talks about her dad, then talks about her dad, mentions her dad and oh she cries a little. Brad pats her on the shoulder, hang in there kid and hurries to run to see the other gals.
The head clown in charge is ready to introduce the hottest bachelor alive... The sexiest man in the world....Yes, children this circus is for you!!! Why is mom breathing so hard? Why little Johnny I don't know???
BRAD WOMACK!! (mom faints)
“I feel like that kid from Titanic. I’m the king of the world.”
I am laughing here. Then I stop...oh wait, didn't that kid drown, freeze to death and get shot at because of a woman??? YOU GO BRAD!!!
Let the show begin!!!
Brad pulls McFarten to the luxury box. He asks her if she is feeling the same friend vibe that he is feeling. WHOA! She's torked. She assures Brad she is confident. I don't need a stupid rose to know you like me. Okay cool, pats her on the head and off they go.
Brad and the girls do some stupid stuff, the dumbest had to be the slim jim wigs.
Steph ends up getting a sympathy rose because she put her heart out there about her dad. Our Brad can't stand a woman in tears.
1-1 Date - Friggan Hillary
San Franciscooooo, boo hoo....
Hillary the ever so polite, thoughtful and considerate bachelorette we have ever known.
keeps it to herself, by squeeling and letting everyone know its HER, HER, HER that gets to go on the one on one date! Such a caring soul.
Our prude and every so meek Solisa helps Hillary into her dress. She runs off to find some scissors. I thought she was gonna stab her.
Oh, Brad it was terrible, she was possessed and I just had to get the demons off of her. But hey, look the dress fits me...
Friggan Hillary states she’s going to just be this great gal, all huggy, lovey dovey and keep him laughing...
Back at the malibu barbie beach pad..the other cows are talking about the 1 on 1 date. Raise your hand if you want her gone? DeAHnna and Farty raise their hands. *note not all bachelorettes were in this discussion...
The girls cannot believe how DeAhhna and Farty can be so rude?” Dee our "I'll kick your butt if you don't give me a rose says, “I’m just being honest. Why would I want her to come back? It’s a competition?” Farty chimes in..“I’m not here to make friends.”
Sweetie can you pass me the sugar...you sure do look nice this evening...
Lets go to San Fran..
Hillary has tears in her eyes...big tears..not little tears, she is crying a river people, she is sobbing so bad, Brad looks confused. He's trying to stop the tears, remove a booger or two, but the gal won't quit crying. What the heck?
Hillary says she just wants to fall in love, I would give you the shirt off my back if it meant something...Yeah sure Hillary, do you give your patients the same preferential treatment? --- psycho
Brad looks like a deer in the headlights...scared he gives her the rose hoping she will shut up! I’m not going to look at you because you will make me cry, she says. HUH? What the heck were you doing before?
still a psycho...
Group Date Two
All aboard...Sheena, Solisa, Kristy, Bettina and Jaded
Sheena (who?) shows off her boating skills...after all she has been around boats her whole life. (who?)She gets pulled over by the coast guard, yeppers, that will get you a man. She sulks in a corner on the boat in shame. Mummsy and dadsy will be so upset at me.
Betty finally admits to Brad she has been divorced. Brad says Pardon? She lather, rinses and repeats. He is still, like Come back big buddy, didn't quite the the 411 there. 10-4.
Kristy's lips don't get in the way and she manages to show Brad that she can have a fun side without sticking their tounges out. She came out of no where, just thought I would see her lips first.
Our church member from the church of T&A, Solisa, shows us her house to make a rising sun...
Double your pleasure, double your fun...
Chad - Identical brother to Brad.
Brad is so Glad, that Chad is here to help Brad. He hopes the girls don't get Mad, for if they do, he will be Sad.
Brad wants Chad to pose as him to see who can tell that Chad isn't Brad. If it's for real they will know your fake. Huh?
form of a hottie - Chad
form of an dork giving one liners from the interns at ABC while watching from a distance in a limo - Brad
Farty - Bradster imposter has the giggles...but she thinks it's Brad.
Lindsey - When do you want to get married, do you like camping? She definitely has no bloomin idea.
Sheena - Where is that ugly mole you had on the side of your ear? OMG did you get it removed? Wait...your not Brad.
Kristy - "SNAP" You are not Brad - DANG give the girl props.
Bettina - Wait you are still interested in me? I told you I was divorced and you are still here? Wait you aren't Brad...
Sarah - Brad you look so different, but you don't seem like you tonight?
Sarah, Solisa from the church of T & A
Can I get an AMEN!
and Lindsey..I'm not gonna cry, I am NOT gonna cry....cries and then they all go home.