Recap for August 25, 2010

Nothing Happened & No One Cares

Okay seriously, a few things did happen, they ate & they slept & they talked but in the grand scheme of all things Big Brother, nothing happened.

Houseguests get BB wake up calls but everyone pretty much ignores them except for Brendon. Britney does get up to change her mic batteries & make some coffee but then goes back to bed in the HOH room.

Brendon talks to us, the live feeders & his family for quite a long time, in the backyard all by himself. He is this years lone & lonely player. He runs down the possible evictions & alliances for the next weeks. He still thinks Lane & Hayden are the lifelong friends. With all the uber BB fans in that house, not one of them has suggested the fish as the lifelong male & female friends. And that pretty much sums up the complete lack of thought, in the BB house, this whole season.

Brendon thinks his only chance to F2 is with Britney & he thinks he has an alliance with her, meanwhile she spends most of today turning back into ‘old Britney’ & slams Brendon whenever she gets the chance. Nice ‘chum Britney’ only lasted a short time but boy was she fun to watch & listen to! CHUM BRITNEY FOR THE WIN!!! I could go with that, but this bitchy, entitled, princess Britney needs to lose & lose big, as a metaphor for her life, so to speak, one of her fave catch phrases! I digress.

Brendon starts cleaning and BB production actually thanks him. He says, your welcome. The house is a total pig sty, now that mama Kathy & papa Andrew have been evicted and soon the houseguests will surrender the house to the ants, cockroaches & mice, cuz they are stronger and have much better alliances. Seriously.

Brendon still the only one up & still talking to the feeds & exercising in the backyard. There is something about this awkward manchild & his sincerity & gratitude that gets me verklempt every time. I just wish that once, he would look at one of the other guys and say, “I am a complete dork & I talk too much & have a bad back, but I do love being alive!” And the stars would come out and birds would sing and all would be right with the world. I can dream!

Ragan alone in the cabana room, super jedi training out loud & the uber BB fan never thinks that perhaps every time he counts something new or goes over some stupid bizarre fact that he knows about the BB house, there is some BB assistant crossing that fact off of the list of things to ask the houseguest in an HOH comp. He is more intent on impressing the anonymous viewers with his BB brilliance than realizing that he is an idiot. Welcome to BB, don’t fasten your seat belts cuz you may doze off from boredom and strangle yourself on said seat belt.

Matt comes in to chat with Ragan and try to convince him to tell the ’boys’ to vote out Enzo & keep him. Mister Passive/Aggressive knows for a fact that Matt betrayed him & tried to get Britney to put Ragan on the block instead of Matt. But Ragan will not speak openly & honestly with Matt, instead he just lets him dig a bigger grave & keeps saying that he has finally “woken up” and realizes he is playing a game & needs to PLAY IT now. Kudos for smelling the coffee burning Ragan, swallow that bitter swill!

But suddenly & inexplicably, Ragan sets aside all his ‘spidey Gollum’ sense & decides to accept Matt’s lame apology & said that no matter what, “we will be friends for life” and that is more important to Ragan than “any amount of money in the world.” cough*gag! This from the guy that let Matt and the feeders know that he is 300k in debt from school loans and does not make any money off the sale of his poetry books on Amazon. I shook my head in bewilderment when he first said it & shook my head again, just now, as I typed it. Mind-boggling.

The ants have now moved into the cabana room & yet this brain trust group does not associate the prevalence of ants with their filth & bizarre, slovenly eating habits. Welcome to the jungle.

The rest of the day is spent with Ragan & Matt talking to everyone else in the house, individually, NOT AS A PAIR, and throwing each other under the proverbial bus. It is like spurned lovers & it is rather creepy. Ragan has gone from a crying sullen mess to an angry, conniving backstabber. Both personalities are equally grating.

Lane is mad that BB replaces his broken blue inner tube with a sub-par pink inner tube. Apparently rich spoiled, sexist lugs, raised in Texas, get much better pool toys than BB provides. Who knew? But no one cares except for Lane.

Matt has started drinking in the afternoon now & is drinking all of the beers for the rest of the houseguests. No one cares.

Enzo hopes BB lets him give his wife a wedding anniversary message.

Ragan tells Britney that he has a “special feeling” that this is going to be Brendon’s last week in the house. No one cares.

Brendon scrubs the communal bathroom from top to bottom. He scrubs the toilet & the showers & everything else. No one cares.

Britney has started bashing Brendon again but it is hard to tell if she is doing this because she really doesn’t like him or if she is trying to make sure that no one suspects she has made an alliance with him. I wonder which it is but I don’t really care, lol.

The rest of the day is spent with manic jedi training about every obscure fact of this BB season and random conversations about how famous they will all be when this season ends. As if, cuz, NO ONE CARES!

The Penguin is causing a minor internet uprising because he is continuing to eat whatever he wants while being a Have Not. Most of the Houseguests are actually helping his cause & no one has turned him in to the DR because, you guessed it, No One Cares!

Matt seems to have swallowed some kind of “diabolical delusional drink” cuz he still doesn’t seem to be able to grasp the concept that he is OUT OF THE BRIGADE. DUN. FINISHED. ADIOS. ZIP. NADA. Well hopefully, you get the picture, meantime Matt hasn’t gotten the picture & continues to campaign to get Enzo ousted and tell everyone how devious Ragan is, so they better save Matt so that he can help save them from Ragan. Whatever. No one cares.

Remember that bizarre gay guy that ran around the house the first two weeks talking about being a “power bottom” and having sex with over 200 guys and only liking guys with BIG SOCKS? Well he made a bizarre guest appearance this afternoon as “Inappropriate ZingBot” these are his zings: “I want to be inappropriate zingbot! Hayden, how many 12 year old girls do you make give you blow jobs under a bridge?” ZING! Hey Matt, how many comatose hospice patients did you stick your finger into? ZING!” There is another one about Lane having sex with dead prostitutes after he has killed them but I think you get the idea by now………….

Rape is never a funny topic of conversation for me & most of the sane people I know on this planet. Orally raping twelve year olds or comatose patients is not my idea of funny in any setting, by any stretch of the imagination. I hope more people care and I am not the only one that thinks Ragan is grossly out of line. In my opinion, Ragan has repeatedly been given a PC pass this year simply because of his sexual orientation. That is similar to giving the differently abled child a pass & letting them turn into a monster. It didn’t work well for Helen Keller and it is not working out very well for Ragan or for anyone that has to stomach his behavior or watch him on the feeds. Call CBS, call your congressman call your congresswoman, call GLAAD, call somebody & get this person to stop his bigoted, sexist rhetoric. It is hate speech, falsely disguised as funny. Now, I guess, someone does care!

Napping. Eating and some game talk. As I suspected, Hayden & Enzo are not pleased that Matt manipulated them into telling him who they were going to vote out last week when he knew he had the DPOV the whole time. Matt is oblivious to the fact that the whole house has turned against him. He is till convincing himself that he is just the ‘pawn’ but Ragan is relishing in dishing out the cold hard facts to Matt, over & over & by late evening he realizes that he is now being “shunned.”

Ragan is still trying to slam Brendon and Rachel at every turn to whomever will listen. He is so consumed with blind rage that he cannot see that one of his few chances at staying in the house, if he doesn’t win HOH, is an alliance with Brendon.

The rest of the day is spent with all of the houseguest jedi training for the HOH quiz they are sure is coming next.

Enzo sneak eats some more. Ragan rages about everything and anything to anyone that will listen & everyone in the house is starting to smack talk about him as soon as he leaves the area. Matt is still crying foul that POV was rigged for him to lose. This from the guy that blatantly threw the HOH cuz he was so cocky & delusional & thought he was so safe. And this from the guy that had the DPOV handed to him on a silver platter and squandered it.

Oh, I forgot to mention that the houseguests, except for Ragan, have pretty much stopped bashing Rachel, but no one listens to him anymore except to placate him enough to secure his jury vote. Even a lot of the Brendon bashing has subsided because both Enzo & Hayden have come to like the guy and Lane has grudgingly acknowledged that Brendon “ain’t that bad.” Most of the BB bashing is saved for Kopper Kathy. Deserved or not, it is more satire than savage but gets old quickly because it is now the only game in town.

Houseguests get a badminton set & the tired recycled pool basketball. The boys have the badminton set broken in record time. The dice that Hayden & Britney made out of playdoh is not dry yet but will have to suffice since none of them knows how to play, or is interested in, playing chess.

The rest of the evening is spent with Lane double showering, don’t ask, lol. General talk about celebs and their celebuspawn and pod casts and inane chatter interspersed with running down BB facts & figures and who is going to put whom up on the block.

Matt is now super paranoid and angry that his brigade is ignoring him and at some point reveals to Ragan that his “super secret” is that he was the one that didn’t make it to last years cast because he bailed at the last minute because of his wedding to Stacey. Matt gets really miffed when Ragan suggests, “oh, so you would have been one of the outcasts?” Matt: “NO, I would have been one of the brains.” He goes on to brag about how he knows most of the BB11 cast and spent a lot of time with them blah blah blah. If this was his “super secret” no wonder his “genius” plans to win BB12 were an epic FAIL. Sheesh~!

Enzo is convinced that they are all going to hate each other by the time this is all over and that sounds good to me because it will match the feeling of all their “fans”, I jest, lol! I know some people really love these lugs and I know I am as addicted to them as the next guy, I just wish there was someone to really loathe or really root for, not just by default, like the underdog Brendon.

Enzo & Britney start giggling & cracking each other up while Hayden & Lane watch and laugh and the scene in the HOH is fun and light while out in the backyard, Gollum and Ratso Rizzo plot the demise of the universe……….or so they think. But, wait for it………insert Ragan pause here, that‘s right, WHO CARES?

Matt has been drinking all day and has the hiccups but Ragan is the one that sounds drunk when he declares that all the other houseguest are afraid of him. Yes, Ragan, go on with your bad self, float down that river in Egypt! DENIAL!

Oh, I forgot to cover the fact that they are all convinced that they are going to be asked back for BB All-Stars but none more than Ragan and Matt. They are already planning their strategies and convincing each other that they will be invincible. I think they will be invisible, but what do I know? And again, lol, who cares?

Matt thinks the guys are ashamed of themselves because they are voting him out of the house & that is why they are ignoring him. The Mensa genius seems to be unaware of the concept of ‘water seeking its own level’ and he was never ever going to be on the ‘cool guys’ level, ever. Well maybe not ever, but he sealed his fate when he spent all of his time bonding with the weird, little talky, guy, instead of spending quality time with his brigade.

And Matt never misses the opportunity to complain that the POV comp was rigged for him to lose. So, maybe BB is manipulating the game so that now, Brendon can stay longer, but I don’t care. God knows they manipulated it long enough to make sure their “Diabolical Genius” would stay in the game, why not work things for the underdog now that his shaven head & missing girlfriend have caused his popularity to soar.

Britney told anyone that would listen that DR pushed her to make Hayden her replacement nomination over Matt & at one point they almost had her talked into it. So Matt has had more than his fair share of opportunities and he has screwed them all, going back to his 3rd week HOH when Brenchel convinced him that they would vote for him to win the money for his “sick” wife & so he made a deal to keep them in the house. His game has gone down steadily ever since & he is soon to be lounging pool side, at the jury house. Cya, wouldn’t wanna bya, but really, WHO CARES?