The Last Day of the SAB & the SOB

Tuesday Aug 31, 2010 and Wednesday September 1, 2010

The Last Day of the SAB & the SOB

Tuesday Aug 31, 2010
Mini-recap

The houseguests woke up & then napped.
That is all. LOL.
No, they did do a few things in between their naps.

Ragan decided to corner Britney & then Lane, to have “conversations” with them but I don’t think he knows the meaning of the word because he just lectured and spoke AT them, instead of conversing WITH them, ad nauseum.

Ragan “conversed” with Idiot, I mean Lane, about why Lane should keep Ragan in the game and then finished his long-pause, long-winded, condescending lecture by saying that no one could beat Ragan for the 500k, if Ragan made it to the final 4.
What?
Did he really just spend an hour of my life, his life & Lane's, begging to stay in the game & then basically tell Lane he would be an idiot to keep him?
Wow.
The Great Communicator, indeed.

The rest of the day the houseguests spent playing with toys BB gave them from the kiddie aisle at Cheap R Us. Ragan joined in just long enough to bash Brendon & Rachel. Britney joined him for some Rachel bashing but when Ragan finally realized he lost his audience he went back to pouting in the Taj & getting drunk.
What a lovely human being.
Truly a stellar example of our commitment to higher education in this country.
Not.
Ragan has spent sixty days being wrong about almost every single thing in the BB house. Ragan came into the house with a masters degree in all things "BB" but he was totally blind to what was going on right in front of him. His read of people and their motives and intentions is such an 'epic fail' it is destined to go down in BB lore. But more than that, his winning 20k for being the duplicate SAB that did NOTHING is the purest epic fail in BB history, ever!

One more day and he will be gone, thank you BB Gods & Goddesses!


Wednesday Sept 1st, 2010

All of the houseguests are up and moving around by the crack of NOON.

Lane & Enzo are in the backyard stalking a preying mantis, when it decides to make a power move & take out Lane. The preying mantis lunges for Lane and Lane jumps & grunts with the grace of wounded water buffalo. Kinda funny to watch, if you have NOTHING else in your life to do or think about.

1pm
The house has become such a bio hazard of filth that Britney is now doing the dishes with gloves on. Smart girl!

1:20pm
Ragan has taken up residence in the Taj room, eviction bed and refuses to leave, even for Lane’s HOH pictures. The requisite Cabana Room pic is not done this week.

There are not very many HOH pics but there is one of the SAB’s letter to Enzo, paired with Enzo’s bizarre, fighter, stealth, UFO, aluminum foil plane. LOL, whacked!

1:40pm
Ragan decides to get out of bed and walks outside to the backyard sofas where Enzo is hanging out. They start talking about the wake up music that BB plays and Ragan is very unhappy. He proclaims that he is so sick of their choices in music that if they don’t play what he wants he is going to do a reverse of Aids caring and “go to Africa and stick the babies with Aids infected needles.”
Enzo is quite taken aback & kind of chuckles, kind of spazzes & then just says “whoah dude.”

Ragan continues to let the world into his sad, sick, demented mind by going into a riff about meeting Julie Chen when he is evicted.

Ragan says he is going to talk about scatological humor with her, until everyone throws up. He is also planning to confront her about the midget or little person he says she “owns.”

It is bizarre & twisted & has been defended as just being “Ragan’s sense of humor.”
Ok, if that IS his sense of humor, where is the funny?
When am I supposed to laugh, exactly?

Ragan continues his nausea inducing tirade & looks into one of the cameras & tells BB production they better “tell them to keep me.” Apparently, his game plan is to intimidate BB into keeping him in the house. Yes, because that worked really well for Chima, last year, right Ragan, right???

My only hope is that Ragan takes his 20k Saboteur winnings & spends it on somebody’s couch. And I am not talking about his West Hollywood trick. I am talking about somebody with a PHD in Psychology or an MD in Psychiatry. The guy needs serious time on the couch.

Ok, end of my Ragan tirade. Back to the recap, lol!

Oh wait, Ragan just instructed Enzo about Twitter & explains to him that if he is a celebrity like Ragan Fox, then he will have his Twitter account ‘certified’. Ok, then. Celebrity. Ragan Fox. Rrrrrrrrright!

3:45pm
Brit and Lane in the kitchen talking about missing their families.

4:45pm
Brit telling Hayden a really sweet story about her younger brother. She manages to twist it and make fun of people at his school but it started out really nice & ended really nice, so there is that.

6:45pm
Britney is going to dye Lane’s beard to make it look fuller. She is going to use the Just for Men dye that he got in his HOH basket.

Ragan has gotten out of bed to drink and workout.

8:15pm
All the guys are in the backyard and Ragan is doing his best to convince them they have made the right decision by evicting him tomorrow. He is being arrogant & condescending and when he goes inside, the guys are pissed and finally vent about it.
Lane says he is sick of Ragan telling them stuff about Matt, when they know Matt & the game he played, better than Ragan did.

They are all sick of him bashing Rachel & Brendon as well. They think he is obsessed with them & don’t understand why he keeps talking about them when they are gone. They are being nice to him simply because of his jury vote, but can't wait for him to leave.

9pm
The guys in the backyard talking about how famous they will be & how much money they will make off of Brigade tshirts & other merchandise.

They deviate from their talk of glory, riches & fame, just long enough to have a laugh at Brendon’s expense over him not knowing that his ND nickname stood for Needle Dick.

They spend quite a bit of time bashing Brendon & only change tunes when Ragan leaves the backyard again & they start bashing Ragan.

Lane is outraged at how much Ragan cusses and some of the things he says while being a teacher. They think he will be in trouble with his school & we get Bubbles.

9:22pm
Camera moves to Ragan alone in the HN room drinking straight from a bottle of wine. He is doing his best 'dying soliloquy bit' but it comes out like a whiny, self-entitled bore.

Meanwhile in the backyard, they guys & Brit are doing “animal kill confessions.” Britney tells a very sad story about killing a turtle when she was 8. She is contrite and sad & Lane interjects that boys ‘kills stuff all the time!” He blows my mind by riffing off a story about putting kittens in bags & then throwing them in the rock crusher.

Dear God.

Please. Please. Please. Make that story not be true. Please. I feel sick to my stomach just typing it and Lane acted like he was talking about getting a glass of iced tea.

Dear God, Please!

I quickly turn the feeds back to Ragan’s backyard patter. I am conflicted as to which feed is causing me more pain. I love kittens & puppies & turtles so I decide to endure Ragan a little longer.

Ragan believes that if he had made it past this week, then he would have won the whole game and he isn’t sad because of the money but just because he loves BB so much. Really? Then why the hell didn’t you play the game instead of getting into a Bromance & judging & ridiculing everyone in the house but your favored few?

Whiny, wino Ragan goes on & on. He has said that he really misses getting “blackout drunk” so I guess this is him making up for missed drunks.

He runs down how he is going to interview Julie Chen, not the other way around and how ‘epic’ it is going to be.

He tells us the name brand clothing he is going to wear for eviction night & tells the live feeders it is all unaffordable to us. 150 bucks for jeans and 75 for a shirt is too expensive for all the live feeders? Compliment us some more Ragan, go on with your bad self!

And he does, oh my god, it just goes on & on:
He thinks he needs to re prioritize the way he looks at people.
He sees himself in the way Rachel does anything to get attention. Says that her getting negative attention reminds him of how he used to be & still is sometimes.
Ragan has ten more years on the books than Rachel and never once finds the compassion or kindness to grant her a reprieve from his bashing.

Ragan has two subjects; himself & Brenchel bashing. Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

He apologizes to BB production for being such a diva but no apology to the live feeders or Brenchel.

He starts crying when he talks about his father.

At one point the gets up to go into the DR but they won’t let him in, which I find rather hilarious. Apparently his apology wasn’t enough. He screams at them that it is his last nite in the BB house but they still wont let him in, so he goes back outside and continues talking out loud.

Ragan insults all of his other housemates by stating that the best thing that happened all season was him meeting Alice and Rich from production. He keeps repeating Alice Brodner, which probably means Allison Grodner, the producer of BB and of course, Ragan causes us to get BUBBLES. Again. As always.

His BB eviction soliloquy continues until he runs out of wine & goes into the BB house to get another bottle.

10:15pm
HOH conversation with Brit and Lane talking about high school. Casual & fun. They go downstairs to shoot pool & Brit talks about feeling guilty for throwing out so much food. Lane is his usual idiot self & says “why, you didn’t have to pay for it!” Brit reminds him that it is wasteful and a lot of Americans go without because they can’t afford groceries.

Ragan is on his second bottle of wine & quite drunk. Stares at himself & says he needs to fix the gap in his teeth.

11pm
Ragan is in the have not room and making his final transition into BB Gollum. He drunkenly thinks he has a chance to stay in his “precious” BB house.
Pass out already, please, this is so boring. Give me a night of Jedi Janey drunk & running down BB stats any day of the week over this, PLEASE!

Lane walks outside and Enzo eloquently ask if Ragan has stuck the wine bottle up his ass? (I think that was on BB UK, Enzo!) Lane says he doesn’t know. They start speculating about Ragan’s exit speech.

Britney comes out of the DR very amped that their season of BB is the most popular ever. DR told her they have the best ratings and she & the guys immediately translate this into popularity in the real world. I hope their fall from that BB pedestal doesn’t cause too much damage!

After causing numerous BUBBLES while talking to Enzo about music and production, Ragan finally passes out and so ends his last full day in his "precious" BB house. What a class act!

Britney spends a lot of the evening cleaning the house & doing laundry. None of the guys help out, that I see.

There is general BB talk and speculation among all of them about what the HOH comp will be but they are all good natured and just relaxed and having fun with each other.

They are all in bed by 3am.

So Ragan and his sick, twisted dementia, is on the way out of BB for good but who is there to root for? Lane kills defenseless animals for fun, Hayden admits to cheating on exams and plagiarizing college papers & Enzo’s stories about his misspent youth are not an easy listen. Britney seems like the default one to root for, but for every soft story she tells about her brother or starving Americans, she has 100 stories bashing someone simply because she doesn’t like the way they breathe.

I hear a little angel telling me not to take BB so seriously & allow humans their faults and I protest, lol! I am not a great person, nor do I expect perfection from my BB hamsters, I just want to be ENTERTAINED and this year has been the most BORING cast, EVER. Whine, whine, tear, tear, lol.

In my BB dreams, the F2 would play for 50k and BB would donate the 500k to the Melorheostosis Association and call it a day.

But still, even now, I am excited about BB13 and praying that casting finds 14 people that have never ever watched the show and don’t think BB is a summer long “actoring” audition or launching pad for bigger and better things.

I can dream!